Ex-Husband's Regret

My head is throbbing. Actually scratch that. My entire b*dy is in pain. I try opening my eyes but I can’t. It felt like they were weighed down by stones I try calling out to Noah, to anyone, but no sound leaves my mouth.

I am moving. Or someone is moving me. Every movement jolts me and just makes the pain all the more excruciating. I wish they would go slowly. Or just stop all together.

“We need a doctor!” someone shouts.

I didn’t understand what they were talking about or why they needed a doctor. Or what was going on. I tried staying conscious but darkness embraced me once more and I fell into it willingly.

When I came back to myself again, I’m not in pain but I still can’t open my eyes. Nor can I move my b*dy. I feel like my limbs were laden with cement. Like I was trapped inside my own b*dy.

I can hear people talking but it all sounds so far away. As their words are submerged under water or something. Nothing made sense and I didn’t understand why this was happening to me.

I was desperate to see Noah, to hear him. He must be so worried that I hadn’t called him. Yet there was nothing I could do.

I fall back to the nothingness, unable to keep up with what was happening around me. My last thought is Noah and how sad he would be that I haven’t called

I wake up and the room is shrouded in light. The brightness of it makes me wince.

“You’re awake” an unfamiliar female voice says,

I try opening my eyes again but with the lights accosting them it’s nearly impossible.

“I’m so sorry about this” she pauses and I hear movements. “You can now open your eyes, the light won’t be a problem”

True to her words, when I open my eyes, curtains are closed and the light are turned low. I turn to the woman who seems to be in her late thirties. She’s wearing a nurse uniform and a quick survey of the room makes me conclude that I’m in a hospital.

“Thank you” I croak out, my voice feeling hoarse

“Here, have this while I go call you doctor. Your family will be relieved to know you’re okay” she hands me a glass of water before leaving.

I sip the water slowly, reveling in the cold water as it cooled my throat. I stare at the room I was in. It’s full of flowers, balloons and teddy bears. There was also a bunch of cards on the table next to me.
I was about to pick one and open it when the door opens and Rowan walks in.

“You look like hell” I tell him, my voice almost back to its normal pitch.

His hair was disheveled, clothes were wrinkled and he looked tired. I have never seen Rowan like this. He is always impeccable and neat. His eyes are tortured and he seems he had been to hell and back.

“How are you feeling?” he asks sitting down next to my bed.

“Like I’ve been hit by a train…what are you doing here?”

He surprises me when he takes my hand in his large one. I go to pull it away but he tightens his.

“Please don’t” he pleads in a small voice. “I need this, I need to remind myself that you’re alive, that I’m not dreaming”

My brows pull together in confusion. Did I wake up in an alternate universe or something? Because things were just not adding up.

“Are you okay, Rowan, you didn’t hit your head or something, right?” I ask, feeling his forehead with my other hand.

He doesn’t get to answer because the door opens and a doctor walks in. He looked at my chart. before his eyes find me.

“Miss Sharp, so glad that you’re up…we were worried for a minute there” he begins with a smile. Now, do you know where you are and what happened to you?”

I nod my head. “The hospital… something forceful pushed me back when I unlocked my car. I hit my head from the impact.”

I’ve tried blocking out what happened to me since I woke up. Afraid of accepting the fact that I almost died.

“Yes, your car was bombed and the force of it blowing is what threw you back “he pauses. “And what year is it?”

I tell him and he notes it down. Rowan squeezes my hand and I look at him briefly. Something passes in his eyes but it gone before I can interpret it.

I was in shock. Never would I have thought that my car would be bombed. With the stress of everything, I feel a headache coming on and pain sipping in

“The fact that you know the year, you recognize your own name and you know who Mr. Wood is, is a good sign. We will have to perform more tests though, just to make sure you aren’t suffering from any type of amnesia”

“Okay” I whisper.

“Now on to your injuries, you dislocated your shoulder so we had to set it right. You have three broken ribs, a ruptured spleen, traumatic brain injury which caused a buildup of fluid in your brain which we had to drain and also some swelling. The stitch from your shoulder wound reopened and we had to re–stitch it. Our main concern right now is you head injury, any questions?” 

My other hand goes to my head since Rowan has refused to let go of my right. The bandage I feel there just makes everything that happened more real.

“How long have I been here?” I ask him.

“This is your fourth day. We had to induce a coma because of the swelling….Some complications might arise with your type of head injury so we will keep you here for a few more days and rule them out. Okay?” 

I nod my head. I felt drained and I just wanted to go back to sleep. He writes something before looking up at me again.

“I’ll let you and your husband have a private moment. I’ll be back later” with that he walks out, closing the door softly behind him.

“Husband?” I ask Rowan with a raised eyebrow.

He looks at me sheepishly and I almost laugh. He looks cute.

“They wouldn’t let me see you otherwise”

“How’s Noah? Please tell me no one has told him what happened, I don’t want him worrying”

His name brings tears to my eyes. I can’t believe how close I had been to never seeing him again. It breaks my heart to know that the last memory he would have had of me if things had been worse, was me saying goodbye to him.

“Hey, it’s okay…you’re okay and so is Noah, he misses you a lot though.” Rowan comforts me, while wiping away my tears..

“You’re acting really weird” I cry–laugh, making him chuckle.

This is the Rowan I wish I had back when we were married. I know he’s only behaving like this because of what happened. Once I’m better he’ll probably go back to hating me. That thought weighs down on my heart, making me really sad.

I sigh when my eyes began to droop. I try to stay awake but my b*dy refuses to obey, instead demanding sleep.

“Sleep, Ava…I promise not to leave you” I hear Rowan telling me right before I feel soft l*ps on my forehead.

I really must have woken up in an alternate universe because there is no way Rowan would be so soft towards me, right?