UNHOLY DESIRE

DEIRDRE

I doubted it had been a minute since Matteo finished speaking when the heavens opened, unleashing their fury.

The once gentle rain now poured heavily, and I could feel the ship’s timbre groan in protest.

Never did I think this would happen. Today, of all days, seemed like the end for me.

I was barely in my prime, with a daughter waiting for me at home, yet here I was in the middle of nowhere no, stuck on a ship in the midst of a storm.

I was going to die; it was evident. I was on the verge of meeting my demise in this unforgiving storm.

Throughout my life, I thought I would live fruitful years and die at a ripe age. Perhaps I shouldn’t have harbored such thoughts and wishes.

Biting my lower lip as it quivered, I turned to Matteo, feeling the grip of his hand on my shoulder.

“Are you alright?” he asked.

“You caused this, Matteo,” I muttered, my eyes welling with tears.

“You brought me here against my wishes, and now I’m going to die. I’m leaving Kendall in this cruel world!” I cried.

Matteo frowned, taken aback, and his eyes narrowed at me. “Is this the right moment to blame me? I know I messed up. I shouldn’t have brought you here. But what can I do now? Nothing, Deirdre. Nothing.”

He was right. He couldn’t do anything to save us. Blaming him might not be wise, but I couldn’t deny he was at fault.

If he hadn’t forced me onto the ship, I wouldn’t be here, fighting for my life.

“Are you done packing all the things you need?” Matteo grunted.

“I’m done,” I nodded.

“Let’s go,” he said, gripping my hand while my other hand clutched the duffel bag.

We were barely out of the room when Vittorio stumbled towards us.

“The flood is fast approaching,” he said. “And ninety percent of the people are still on board.”

“Did you secure a lifeboat for Deirdre and me?” Matteo asked.

Vittorio nodded, and Matteo gripped my hand again, leading us to where Vittorio had arranged the lifeboat.

The blaring alarm became even louder as we rounded the corner.

“Ugh,” I groaned, letting go of Matteo’s hand and plugging my ears. It was the stupidest time for my sound sensitivity to act up.

As if the alarm wasn’t enough, a loud bang echoed, and the smell of smoke filled the air.

“Deirdre, we need to get to the lifeboat,” Matteo urged.

I wanted to retort that I knew that, but the blaring alarm needed to stop before I could move.

I gasped, stumbling as the ship swayed again. Matteo swiftly hoisted me across his shoulder as if I weighed nothing.

I didn’t protest; I was glad he lifted me because, glancing behind, I saw water pouring in, and I doubted I could outrun it.

“Follow me, stay close!” a man yelled, holding his daughter while his pregnant wife followed. I felt pity for him as if we weren’t in the same situation.

We navigated the corridor, dodging debris and flames.

“We’re almost there,” Vittorio said.

“Okay,” Matteo said, and I nodded, my reaction evident even as I was still on Matteo’s shoulder.

At a junction, Matteo let me down. Without panting, I saw his expression hardened.

“What now?” he growled.

I saw our path blocked by a collapsed bulkhead.

“We need to find another way,” Vittorio said.

“We have to,” Matteo affirmed, his eyes narrowing as he scanned the surroundings.

“What about there?” I pointed to what seemed like a maintenance hatch.

“Through there,” Vittorio agreed.

“Can you run?” Matteo asked, not waiting for my response before gripping my hand and dashing through the narrow hatch, emerging into a dimly lit maintenance corridor.

“Urgently, this way! It leads to the auxiliary control room!” one of the engineers shouted, and I counted up to twenty of them in that frantic moment.

I had thought everyone had fled the ship until now.

“Go with Vittorio,” Matteo let go of my hand and shoved me towards where Vittorio was.

“No, Matteo,” I shook my head frantically.

“Deirdre,” Matteo growled.

“I can’t leave you here,” I yelled at him. “We are leaving together.”

A vein in Matteo’s jaw ticked as if he was trying his best not to get angry. His gaze left mine and focused on Vittorio.

“De Luca, you remember your promise to me?” he asked Vittorio.

“I do,” Vittorio said, gripping my hand.

“What the hell, Matteo? I’m not some commodity to be shuttled between two people.”

Matteo ignored me as if I hadn’t just spoken. “If I don’t make it out alive, take her to Giovanni. He knows what to do with her.”

“Matteo!” I screeched, but he didn’t respond. “What about Kendall? If you don’t care for me at all, at least care for your daughter. Care about our daughter.”

“My daughter?” Matteo scoffed. “For all I know, she might be a bastard.”

“What?” My eyes widened, locking onto Matteo.

Was he trying to hurt me by denying Kendall’s parentage?

“I was a virgin when I met you,” I said bitterly.

“Doesn’t matter,” Matteo dismissed. “And as I said before Deirdre, you have always been something I used to while away my time. You are a momentary plaything, and I’m letting you know now that you are and will never be anything to me.”

“W-what?” I could only stutter, tears clouding my vision.

Matteo looked serious, damned serious.

“Keep the ring. I’m a generous man. I’ll treat you like a charity case, as you always have been,” he smiled a cold one, his eyes devoid of any emotion.

Yanking my hand off Vittorio as he started to tug me forward, I pulled the ring from my finger and tossed it at Matteo. It bounced off his jacket, rolled down the floor, and stopped at his feet.

“You’re a bastard. A selfish, arrogant bastard. I regret knowing you, and I hate you,” I said, infusing all the hatred in me into my voice, though what I wanted was to cry at his feet and have him take back his words.

“Good to know, Cara. The feeling is mutual.”

“Take her away from my presence,” he told Vittorio.

Vittorio pulled my hand again, and this time, I didn’t let go.

Vittorio and I ran down the narrow passageway, my mind dwelling on what had transpired between Matteo and me. He had made me look like a fool for the second time.

Shit! What was I going to tell Kendall?

Perhaps letting her know her so-called father was a monster this time would be best.

“Almost there,” Vittorio said as we kept running in the confined space.

The ship shuddered again; a deafening roar of tearing metal pierced the air, but I didn’t stop running. I was exhausted, but I kept pushing forward. All for Kendall. I needed to reach her.

Eventually, we reached the auxiliary control room, finding it filled with crew members trying to stabilize the ship.

“Good, you made it. Get to the lifeboats; we’ll hold on here as long as we can,” one said.

Vittorio turned the other way, not following the people trying to get to a limited lifeboat.

“Where are we going?” I asked him.

“I’ve got a lifeboat for you,” he said, and we sprinted to where it was.

Vittorio helped me into it and placed in some supplies, and I saw hesitation in his eyes as he started to step in.

“I need to go back to him,” he said.

“Who, Matteo?” I grimaced as his name sounded sour in my mouth.

“Yes, him. You understand he didn’t mean anything he said, right?” he asked.

“I believed everything he said,” I stated. There was no way he wasn’t telling the truth.

“He’s trying to protect you, Deirdre. Can’t you see that he wants you alive for your daughter?” Vittorio asked.

“I saw nothing,” I said, and it was the truth. All I saw was coldness and hatred.

“We have no time to waste, Vittorio. You need to get in,” I added.

The ship lurched one final time.

Reluctantly, Vittorio got into the boat, and just then, the captain yelled over the intercom.

“Everyone, abandon ship! Repeat, abandon ship!”

“Hold on tight,” Vittorio said, strapping me and himself in the lifeboat.

“Matteo,” I murmured, my heart drumming wildly as I glimpsed the ship crumbling faster.

A single tear rolled down my cheek. He was going to die. No, not if he was dead already. He didn’t have a life jacket with him, and I doubted he could withstand the disaster.

“I hope you meet the devil in hell,” I muttered, my teeth clenched.