Unforgiven Sins

Cinyla’s POV

I was stunned by the absence as if something was waiting, but the truth was the depth of what I was thinking. It’s late at night because mama came home from her walk, and what’s even more surprising is that I haven’t reached her this morning. We still plan to go to church but I just look like maybe now.

“Hi, love! Are you okay? The depth of your thoughts huh?” BenChua asked as he brewed coffee.

I looked at it badly and laughed at him. “Why do you call me love? The speed with which you think about what we call we don’t even have a label!” I said angrily and took the coffee I was drinking and sat in the living room because later I will take a shower to get ready and leave.

“Hey, I’m sorry, don’t get angry right away. I’m sorry, I’m just advanced in my thinking. Don’t you want me to call you love or dear?” He came over and stood beside me as he mixed his coffee in front of me.

“No, I just don’t want you to be so fast and decisive! It should be knowing each other first, before that call sign. Besides, you haven’t even flirted yet, after all, you’re like that. Wait, did you see mama leave again, or did someone tell you? ” I asked.

He set aside his coffee first and approached me, “I’m sorry.” Its tenderness as it hugs me slightly. “Go away!” I said angrily and it stopped immediately. “No, I saw him this morning and he was crying. He came home too late, eh. Then when I came down, he just left and said to take care of you first.”

“C-Crying?” I repeat what he said.

He nodded, “Yes! I don’t know because he suddenly entered the room. He noticed me here in the kitchen at 1 AM because I was thirsty,” he added.

I thought about it and worried about mama, she didn’t even text or call. It seems like it’s always busy and there’s something to hide. But if there is, what is it?

Until BenChua tapped me, “Are you going to church? I’m just like you. Let’s go to church.” This invitation is surprising because he is the one who offered it.

“Are you going to church?” I said jokingly.

“Of course! I’m also a devout person just in case I rarely go to church because I’ve been really busy.” He bragged while still adjusting himself as if he thought he could pass me with actions.

“You know if you’re coming, just get ready and I’ll take a shower first. Consume your coffee and I’ll wash this glass.” When I order and stand up. I wanted to laugh out loud because of how he looked now, but in the end, I just chose to go upstairs to take a shower as well.

There’s a CR downstairs but I’d rather just be in my room so I can call mama. I feel different now like something is wrong or I’m just really worried. I’m no longer happy with what’s been happening these past few days.

Instead of thinking about anything, I just chose to pick up my cell phone and dial my mom’s number. But, I waited a few minutes and it just rang. Mom, answer me. Where are you

I’ve made a few calls but here, I only receive ringing. By the time I noticed the time, we were about to leave with only 30 mins left. I hurried inside and without hesitation, I hurried to take a bath.

After I took a bath, I got dressed immediately because BenChua was waiting downstairs. He was refreshing, going to church. It’s not that I’m judging him or anything, it’s just really surprising because it seems like in the past, he didn’t come with us. I adjusted myself when suddenly there was a knock on the door.

“Love? Are you done? What time is it oh, we’re going to travel!” This cry caused me to smile slightly because of our situation.

“I’m going down too, just wait. Thank you!”

I hope it’s just true that we’re like this, and I hope I don’t know anything else about him.

And in a few moments, I was coming down as well. “Let’s go!” I said happily.

“How long have you been ?! What bath did you take, love? You didn’t even take me with you,” he said innocently. I hit him using my hand, “Hey! It’s Sunday, let’s go!” I just pulled his hand out because I would lock this door and the gate.

“Let’s go!”

He followed and opened the door of his car for me, “Ride dear,” he said.

I smiled at what he said and went inside. I don’t know why I feel like this when he mentions the word love in English, I feel my heart jumping inside my body.

I didn’t realize it was inside and he immediately put a seatbelt on me. “Thanks! But maybe BenChua I’ll get used to what you say and do,” I said.

“No, I’ll repeat it many times so you know I love you. Just, after our church, we’ll go somewhere.” His voice was soft and he was already wearing his seatbelt. I just nodded and suppressed my trembling, is that right instead of shivering at the mass but it looks like him first.

@PARISH CHURCH

We have already arrived at St. Parish Church neatly, lots of people but it was also good and we found a seat. The mass was already starting when we arrived but thank you because we were still able to catch up.

And as we listened, I couldn’t help but turn to my left. He was sitting there and he was focused on the mass.

Lord, is this the one for me? If your answer is yes, I will not refuse.

“Stop looking at me like that I know, I’m handsome” Its weak voice caused me to look back to the front.

“N-no!” I whispered.

He just smiled foolishly and immediately returned the focus to the mass, I didn’t even look because I might blame him for being naughty. I don’t want to add my sin again because of my mind.

We spent about an hour at church and when it was over we decided to eat fast food first.

“Where do you want to eat?” he asked as he held the steering wheel.

“Let’s just go to KFC, my favorite American fast food to eat,” I said.

“Sure!” He turned the car on and we headed straight to KFC.

And as he drove, he broke our silence. KFC is not far but we reached traffic. He stopped driving first because there was still traffic. In reality, the traffic was moving slowly. So first we need to extend our patience. And I didn’t expect the last thing he said.

“Cinyla, my love, can you be my girlfriend? he asked which makes me surprised.

I can’t, I have a boyfriend but I don’t have any news about him.