Torrid Little Affair (Forbidden Desires #3)

“It was right there under our noses.” I slammed a hand against my desk. “She put him on her medical insurance and everything. How did none of us notice that?”

Gavin shook his head. “How could we have known? Benefits handles all that, and I wasn’t about to tell them you were sleeping with one of our employees. We would have been crazy to even think-”

“Except we didn’t think. And she is. Fucking married.” I gritted my teeth again and scrubbed a hand over my stubbled jaw. “She’s been avoiding me. Talking about how she wants to be with me but she can’t, and now I know why. She’s using me to cheat on her poor fucking husband.”

Gavin took a deep breath. “Look, let me call Quinn. We’ll bounce early and spend some time at my place. If you want, I can tell Emma to go out with her friends for a while and-”

“Don’t bother. I’m not going to kick your wife out of her own home. It’s all right if she’s there. I just need to blow off some steam.”

I gathered up my things and followed him out of the office, my guts churning as we got into his town car.

Once the driver pulled the car onto the street, Gavin sent a quick text, then reached for the bottle of whiskey he always kept in the icebox. Taking one of the cut crystal glasses from the shelf beside him, he poured a healthy measure and then handed it to me.

“Drink,” he commanded.

“I don’t want to drink,” I said. In fact, I didn’t want to do much of anything except find Aaron O’Neil and apologize for sleeping with his wife.

God, what a nightmare I’d gotten myself into. And all because I hadn’t learned my lesson the first time. This was what I got for letting my heart guide me.

Never again.

“I didn’t ask if you wanted to drink. I told you to drink. We’re going to handle this the way Kingsley men do. With alcohol and self-loathing.” He poured himself his own glass, then clinked it to mine before taking a swig.

It wouldn’t solve anything, but right now, I was willing to go along. Anything to dull the throbbing pain in my chest where my heart used to be. I followed suit, swallowing hard as the liquid burned its way down my throat.

“So, what do I do?” I asked after the last of my drink was gone.

“What have you already done?” Gavin asked.

“I texted her and told her I knew . . . in not so many words.”

“And where is your phone now?”

I sighed. “I left it at the office. I just can’t deal with that right now. I don’t want to hear her excuses.”

“Good decision. Tonight, we’re going to let boys be boys, okay?”

We pulled up in front of Gavin’s high-rise and made our way quickly to the penthouse. When we stepped inside, we found Emma and Quinn already there, sitting in the sunken living room, chatting quietly about something I couldn’t hear.

Based on their expressions when they turned to look at me, though, I had a pretty good guess.

Emma stood instantly before sweeping across the room and kissing her husband on the cheek. “Hey,” she said, then moved toward me and kissed me on the cheek too.

“Hi.” My voice sounded gritty. “Nice to see you.”

And it was. In spite of everything we’d been through, when I looked at her now, I felt . . . well, nothing. I loved her, yes, but only because she loved my brother and took care of him.

Because now that I’d been with Corinne?

I knew what love actually felt like. What it was to want to be with a person so badly that you could hardly breathe when they weren’t around.

The truth was I’d never felt that way about Emma. I’d found her attractive and interesting and kind, but she didn’t light me on fire the way Corinne did. She didn’t make me want to stay up all night peppering her with questions just so I had a little more of her to carry with me throughout our moments apart.

Emma squeezed my bicep. “I was going to order pizza, and then I’ll give you guys some space. Have a favorite topping?”

“Don’t let him pick. He’s an anchovy guy,” Quinn said.

“Then he’ll get his own pizza with extra anchovies.” Emma grinned. “Sound good?”

I nodded and she slipped from the room, her cell phone in hand, leaving me alone with my brothers.

Quinn stood up and made his way to the bar cart. Without asking, he poured three measures of Gavin’s best bourbon and held them out to us. If Gavin minded, he didn’t say as much.

“So, there’s no need to tell me what happened. Gavin took care of that,” Quinn said. “Tonight, we don’t even have to talk about it if you don’t want to.”

“I don’t know what there is to talk about.” I took a seat on the sofa. “She’s married. I can’t be with her now. Even if she did leave her husband, how could I ever trust her?”

Quinn nodded, then took a sip of his drink. “I know.”

I turned to Gavin. “You should tell Emma she doesn’t have to hide. I don’t mind if she’s around.”

Gavin shook his head. “I know that. I just think it’s better if it’s the three of us tonight. Now come on, let’s drink like we mean it.”

Quinn clinked his glass to Gavin’s and the three of us settled in, discussing business, sports . . . anything and everything except for the state of my love life.

I knew they were trying to distract me, and sometimes I did find myself laughing or talking about the old times. But more often than not, my mind would drift back to Corinne. When it did, I’d take another sip, wishing I could quiet my racing thoughts.

It was good not to be alone, but even surrounded by my brothers, I felt isolated. My heart was shattered in ways they could never understand, and even though they tried, there was no way of explaining this to them. No way of feeling truly whole.

So I drank and ate pizza and played along, finally passing out a little after midnight, but I knew when morning came I would feel the same.

Broken and beyond repair.

Tomorrow I would be well and truly alone in this. Reality would finally sink in, and I’d be facing a life without the only woman I’d ever truly loved.

Motherfucker.