Too Beautiful for the Alpha

Chapter 25

After wandering around for nearly an hour, I ran into the border and told a guard that I had gotten lost.

After convincing him that James is my Mate, he led me back to the pack house. Now we wait standing

at the door for someone to answer. Thankfully, Gail opens up and looks at me, then the guard. "What

are you doing back so soon? I thought Theodore was taking you on a tour around the pack grounds?"

Before I can speak, the guard asks authoritatively, "You confirm that this young lady is mated to Alpha

Grant?"

Gail pulls me in. "Yes, she is. You can go now. Come on."

She shuts the door and I drift into the kitchen where Theresa is. Gail follows behind me. "You're back

early," Theresa comments. "Where's Theodore?"

"I left him."

Gail places her hands on her hips. "What do you mean you left him?"

"I ran from him after making his sister cry," I say and sit myself down on a stool. "I got lost. That's why a

guard had to bring me back."

"You made his sister cry?"

I sigh and turn to face them. "His sister was James'...lover. I just wanted to talk to her, but she started

yelling at me, saying she loved him, that I took him away from her and shouted for me to leave, so I did.

I don't know. I panicked."

"Now why would you go and talk to her in the first place?" Gail asks, walking around the counter.

"I wanted answers from her, and I got them, but now I want to give it all back. It was better when I didn't

know."

Gail says genuinely, "Some things just need to stay in the past, dear."

I nod and slip off of the stool. "I need to think things over."

I head upstairs and close my bedroom door behind me, facing the room with a new perception. In her

mind, I probably did come out of nowhere and wreck everything she had built. I couldn't imagine what it

would feel like to love someone one day and be dropped the next. I wonder where her mate is, if he's

dead like Noah's, or if she just hasn't found him yet. Doesn't she look forward to that? Finding her

mate?

Maybe Claire is capable of loving beyond the bond. We're different, Claire and I. She seems like a

passionate person, someone who falls in love hard when they do. She may have taunted me from the

hallway, but maybe she deserved at least that. I couldn't imagine James abandoning me for someone

else now, right when we seem to be getting places, but could he? I like to think that I'm different

because I'm his mate, because I can give such pleasure with a simple touch, but am I? If the bond

didn't exist, would I be another Claire in his eyes?

I don't want a normal love with normal pleasures, I want the exclusive one, the one that's exclusive to

James. I want the deeper, more engulfing love, the love that brands my heart and makes my toes curl.

Noah would have never made me happy because I want more. Is it wrong to want more?

Is it wrong for me to crave something I thought I could never have?

I reach for Julianna's diary but promptly remember that I had finished it. I'll have to grab the next year's

from the blocked-off room, but I'll ask James first this time.

Now that I know of Julianna's end, I read more carefully, pointing out the signs and convincing myself

that I don't act the same way. I'm waiting for the entry where she talks of James' conception. I'm waiting

for her to sound truly happy.

Wishing I had gone on the tour with Theodore, I leave my bedroom, looking for some form of

entertainment. At least he would have distracted me for a few hours with training grounds and meeting

people and housing. That sounds better than laying in my bed until another chance at establishing a

position comes to me. If I'm going to be mated to an Alpha, I may as well have people know me as their

Luna. I'm tired of guards doubting me. Maybe I'll tell James to spread the word that he's found his

mate. It's time.

I close my door behind me and stare ahead at his two large ones. I hear Gail and Theresa downstairs

in the kitchen, so I begin my act towards them, playing Claire. She's quiet and stealthy, so I sneak

down like a hunting lioness, my steps careful, but I also peer back at my door. She'd always peer back

at my door, I think, hoping I would be watching.

Like Claire would, I grip the door handle and open it just enough to slip inside, and I do. I drown myself

in his scent and fall back with the door, facing his room like I'd face my own. I'd see him there, on the

bed or leaving the bathroom. James would welcome her with some charming or dark look and she'd

climb onto the bed, so I do. He'd stalk towards her, but I'm going to forget about her, so he'd stalk

towards me. Claire no longer matters. She's right. I am the Luna, I am his mate, and she's not.

I have the power.

So here I lay, on his bed that is my bed, and he'd near me, the woman he'd serve until he is forgiven.

That's what I'm doing here, right? Waiting until he makes up for all he's done to me. I have power over

him. That was his mistake, I suppose. He hurt me, and he gave me power.

I spread my arms out amongst his bedding and wrinkle it to my own desires. He'd stand at the foot of

the bed, he'd watch me with lustful eyes like a fresh kill. I'm served on a silver platter, aren't I?

Untouched. I can't tell myself that I'd preserved myself for him, though, because it's just not true. But I

am exactly that, untouched.

It just gives me more power now, doesn't it? He must love that his mate is only for him and will forever

be only for him. She may have had experience, but I can give him so much more. Not only will my body

be his, but I'll carry his children, and imagine the power that comes with that.

James is Alpha, no. I am the Alpha.

He needs me.

And he'd lay on the bed, and I'd stand before him. I'd climb over him and he'd ache of anticipation.

James would beg for me, he'd beg for just one...soft...touch—

"Rae?"

My eyes shoot open. "Yes?" I call, frozen.

His footsteps near the bed and I immediately sit up when I see him standing before me. James

watches me carefully. "Rae, what are you doing?"

"Um," I improvise, "I thought you wanted me in here? Am I not allowed to be in here?"

His eyes intensify. "Of course you can be in here. It was just unexpected."

"Well, then I guess I can explain why I'm home already."

"No," he says, sitting down on his bed next to me, "Theodore already explained after his apologies. He

said that you ran off while he was distracted, and he couldn't find you."

"Oh, well, I was going to tell you that it wasn't his fault."

James sighs. "Why did you run off? Was something wrong? Did he do something to you?"

"No. Not at all. I actually asked him to take me to see someone instead of on a tour," I explain, staying

true to my defense for Theodore. "I asked him to take me to his sister."

James' muscles tense and he looks away. "You wanted to talk with her," he mutters, probably hoping

this day would never come.

I discreetly run my bottom lip through my teeth before asking the daunting question, "Did you love her?"

James' eyes find mine. "I thought I did."

"Are you done with her?"

"Completely."

I nod and grab his hand, squeezing lightly. "I told you the truth James, and I expect the same back, so

I'm going to believe you. If I find out otherwise, I'm done here."

James shifts, now facing me. "Will you tell me why you were laying on my bed now?"

A subtle blush dusts on my cheeks. If we're being honest with each other, then I may as well be

completely honest. So I lean forward and bring my lips deathly close to his and look up into his eyes.

James' fingers trail down my jaw before getting a good grip, then he brings his lips to mine in short,

passionate kiss as if we're sealing the deal. The sensation wraps around me and my brows furrow, not

understanding why it has to be so short, and I bring our lips together again. And while we immerse

ourselves in the addiction, I hardly take my lips from his, "No one else, James."

I move closer, needing to be closer, and he suddenly brings me on top of him, onto his lap. My heart

races and a gasp escapes me as we enter a new realm, one that I'm not mentally or physically ready

for. Each of my legs is on either side of him and his hands grasp my waist, and I pull away from his lips,

my face hot. My hand rests on his chest like a stop sign.

I look down at his handsome face, and for a moment, wonder how I got here. "Not yet," I breathe

out.