The Single Dad: Girl’s Sexual Awakening

“I don’t know,” I answered. “I think so. I’m sore still.”

“Sydney, I know you better than you know yourself.” She paused. “And I know you’re not okay. I can hear it in your voice.”

I couldn’t hide it.

I didn’t know why I was even trying to.

But now that it was out there, I couldn’t seem to rein the emotion back in.

“Gabs,” I whispered as the first tear fell, reaching toward the counter for a tissue and my phone, holding both to my face, “it was so scary.”

“I know.”

Once the first tear dripped down my cheek, there were so many behind it. My lips quivered; my chest pounded.

“The noise from the accident, the metal on metal, and then seeing Everly being carried away on a stretcher and Ford injured, and then the explosion of him throwing the chair and …” I didn’t tell her that Ford wasn’t Eve’s biological father-that wasn’t my news to share-but there was that too. I took a breath, my lungs so tight. “I honestly think it’s going to be a while before those images are out of my head.”

“I don’t think they’ll ever leave you, babe.”

When I glanced at my reflection, I didn’t see someone who was weak.

I saw someone who was surviving.

And as I cried to my best friend in my bathroom, the heaviness inside my chest started to break away.

“You’re probably right,” I told her.

“But do you know what will come out of this? You and Ford and Everly are going to be stronger, the three of you-together.”

I dabbed the tissue under my eyes. “You’re probably right about that too.”

“I know I’m right. Now, do you need anything? Booze? Chocolate? An escape car? A trip to Cancun? Name it, and it’s yours.”

I laughed.

It felt so good and was so needed.

“No, you’ve already done so much.”

She’d sent two massive bouquets, which were sitting in Ford’s kitchen, one entirely made of pink flowers. She’d had multiple meals delivered to me in the hospital. Not to mention, she’d sat with me and his family during Ford’s surgery.

“Um, hello? That’s what besties are for, which reminds me. I’m coming over tomorrow night for drinks. I don’t care if I have to sit with you and Ford and Eve on the couch or snuggle between you guys in bed. I’m there. I’m bringing multiple bottles of wine. I’m staying the night. And we’re drinking alll of it.”

I exhaled the largest breath of air. “I can’t wait.”

“Then, I’ll see you tomorrow. I love your ass.”

“I love you more.”

We hung up, and I quickly threw on some clothes and braided my hair, so I wouldn’t have to dry it. My face was a mess from crying, so I lathered on some concealer and blush, a little mascara, and I made my way across the garage into the house.

The smell of Craig’s cooking instantly hit me.

He’d arrived while I was gone, and I’d forgotten he was even coming.

“Chicken soup?” I asked as I walked into the kitchen.

Craig stood at the stove, stirring the large pot.

My mouth watered as I got closer, the scent becoming stronger.

“The one and only,” he replied. “It cures everything.”

I smiled. “Then, we’ll each take double servings.”

“You got it.”

I continued into the living room, where Ford and Everly were spread across the couch, an animal show playing on the TV.

“How are my favorites doing?” I asked, sitting on the small bit of cushion between their heads, running my hands through their hair.

“Syd, you’re missing the lions.” She reached up and played with the end of my braid. “They’re roaring all over the place.”

I kissed her forehead. “I’m here now, so I can get all caught up.”

Ford tilted his head back to look at me, staring for several seconds before he said, “You were only gone for twenty-five minutes.”

“I told you I just needed to shower.”

“And I told you to take your time.”

I winked. “I did. I even shaved.”

He laughed. “I guess that’s a good thing since Malorie is on her way over.”

“Who?”

“The massage therapist my mother uses. She’s coming to give you a two-hour massage.”

My chest felt tight again, but for an entirely different reason. “You’re kidding …”

“And then you’re having dinner with Kendall and Jo and Hannah tonight. They wanted to surprise you, but I figured you’d want a little time to get ready.”

The tears were threatening to return to my eyes. “But what if you guys need me-”

“Dominick and Jenner are coming with them, and they’re going to stay here while you’re gone. In their words, they’re going to play nurse-whatever the fuck that means.”

“Daddy! Bad word! You put a dollar in the swear jar!”

“Fudge. Whatever the fudge that means.”

I ran my hand across his beard. It had grown so much thicker; it hadn’t been groomed since the accident. “I don’t know what to say …”

He pushed himself up and kissed me.

“Ewww, Daddy! Enough smoochin’.”

I laughed as we separated and said to Ford, “I love you.” And then I pressed my lips to Everly’s cheek and whispered, “I looove you.”

TWENTY-FIVE

FORD

I

was just finishing a set of curls when Everly came running into my home gym, shouting, “Bye, Daaaddy!”

Her hair, which was getting so long, bounced like the top of a mop, her glittery shoes squeaking across the rubber flooring.

“No running.”

She only slowed when she reached me. “Oopsie. Too late.” She raised her arms in the air.

I placed the weights down and lifted her up, holding her against my chest, and noticed Sydney standing in the doorway. Her hand was wrapped around the handle of Eve’s pink suitcase. “Looks like you have everything packed for Mimi and Papa’s house.”

“Yep.” She made a face. “You’re sweaty.”

I laughed. “Are you going to be a big girl and not kick Mimi in the face when you sleep with her and Papa tonight?”

She giggled. “Daddy, I don’t do it on ‘urpose.”

I used my weaker arm to tickle her and roared into her neck, “You don’t do it on puuurpose.”

“Daddy, you sound like a cat, puuuring.”

This kid.

I cuddled her into me. “I’m going to miss you tonight.” I kissed her cheek. “I love you.”

She giggled, still feeling the tickles, and said, “More than all the stars in the sky.”

Every time she’d said that since the accident, it was more meaningful.

It had been sixteen weeks, and I would never know that girl had experienced a single second of pain.

But we talked about it. We kept the communication open. The last thing I wanted was there to be emotional triggers that had a lasting effect.

“Be good,” I told her. “Listen to your grandparents and don’t stay up too late.” I gave her another kiss and set her down. “And don’t run. There are too many things in here that you can trip on.”

“Okaaay, Daddy.” She joined Sydney in the doorway.

“Your mom will be here any second,” Sydney said. “I’m going to walk her out.”