Forty Three
Astra zipped up her box for the camp. She was ready to leave. She wrapped her hair hair up in a by and straightened her white shirt over her dark jean trousers.
“Are you set?” Jared asked from her living room. He had gotten to her place a little early.
“Yeah, I am good,” she replied. Astra decided to forget all about what happened with Nicholas and move on. It did not really matter so much, and she was not exactly in her right senses when it happened, she could not also blame Nicholas either as she remembered inviting him to her bed. She also slept in the nude.
“Okay, then, let’s get going,” Jared said and helped her with her box. Astra wondered the reason why Nicholas wanted to make her jealous with Sarah as they got into the car. That part of the story was never really clear to her, she needed more validation in that respect.
“So tell me a bit about your friends, I don’t want to be lost when I get there,” Astra said. She really needed to stop thinking about Nicholas so much.
“Well, we are going with Ian, a very good friend of mine. He paints, but he is actually a resident doctor. He comes with his wife Patricia, they have two kids, a boy and a girl, but they usually leave them behind with Ian’s parents,” Jared started as they got into the car. They were driving to the cabin alone. So they were having a bit of a road trip.
“Then there is another of our friend, Wilson, he is coming with his fiancee, Rina, I would actually like to invite you as my date to his wedding,” Jared said and Astra laughed, even though she was starting to get scared. She might be involving herself too deeply with him when she was not totally sure that she would be with him till the very end. If she was not sure she was even in love with him. She was still in love with Nicholas.
“And then there is Roger, but his wife, Jocelyn, just had a baby, and so he would not be able to make it,” Jared said and Astra sighed.
“So many names. I hope I will be able to keep up,” Astra said. Deep down, she was even more scared. Everyone else was bringing their wives or fiancee as their significant other. And Jared was bringing her. It was obvious that he looked at her in that respect, a wife to be or something like that. Astra was not sure what to do with that information.
“I am a bit nervous now,” Astra said out loud. Jared was easy to talk to, it was one of the things that she liked about him, she could just go and on without feeling self conscious.
“Relax, everything would be fine. I am also kind of nervous too, and their my friends,” Jared admitted after trying to encourage her. Astra rolled her eyes at his admission. It seemed the nerves were general.
Astra could not help herself, she laughed. “Funny that you are telling me to relax,” she said.
“We should talk, talking helps to calm the nerves,” Jared said and Astra raised an eyebrow at him. Where did he hear that? Maybe distraction did help to calm the nerves, and talking was a distraction.
“Okay. So ask me a question,” she said and Jared smiled.
“A little bird told me that you had to do plastic surgery. That you didn’t always look like this. I don’t take you for the vain type and I was not sure whether to believe them or not,” Jared said and Astra frowned. It occurred to her then that Jared did not know much about her. He knew that she was once with Nicholas but he didn’t know about the plastic surgery.
“I was in a fire accident. I was very down and depressed about the fire accident amongst other things and I was drunk. I sincerely do not remember how the fire started. It was my neighbour who saved me and bought me to the hospital. The situation was already very bad by then. My skin was already badly damaged and I lives that way for a while until, my alimony with Nicholas came. It was so much money, a friend suggested I use part of it for the surgery. I was able to get a discount of sorts,” Astra said and she saw pity in Jared’s eyes, she realized that she did not like it, not one bit.
“I am sorry to hear that. I would have not imagined. People can be very harsh with their judgments,” Jared said and Astra agreed with him. People could be very judgmental without knowing the details. Astra hadn’t even told him the entire story. She was not ready to tell him all the details yet.
“That’s true,” Astra agreed.
“I am sorry if it was a sensitive topic for you. It must have been a gruesome experience,” Jared said. Gruesome did not begin to cover the experience. It was painful and scary, she felt like she was seeing death. The smoke was choking and almost killing her, and she hated herself for so long. She hated her body, she hated her mental health. She wanted to commit suicide for so long, it had taken her so long to normalize and love her self again.
“It was a hard time, but I have moved on and I am grateful,” Astra said.
“That’s nice. I don’t even have any scars of the sort, so I can’t totally say I understand. The only thing I have that is relatively close to a burn is when I fell from a tree when I was young, I broke my arm, I still have the scar from then,” Jared said and Astra smiled. She was quite like a boy when she was a child and fell from a lot of places.
“My sisters were very girly girls and being a boy felt like rebellion. So it seemed like I had to do everything and then more. I was actually quite stubborn, made my parents go crazy,” Jared said and Astra laughed. She could barely picture Jared as a stubborn child, he was so calm now as an adult.
“Wow, I did rebel a lot, but that was because I sensed that my parents preferred Charise to me. It did not help that I was actually right,” Astra said. Her parents had not been the best kind and it still affected her as she did not know to react to unadulterated love. It still scared her.
“You have been through a lot Astra. I want to make it better,” Jared said and Astra could not help her sigh. Jared did not know half of what she had been through. She was truly broken. She did not know if anyone could help her.
“I really want this to work Jared. I do,” Astra admitted. Her heart was just too stubborn, it was loyal to a fault. Nicholas had hurt her multiple times but she still loved him, it was crazy.