Chapter 83
Killian’s POV
” Killian, you need to calm down. Liam will be here soon to tell us what’s really going on.” Raymond says on Monday morning as I pace the floor of my office.
Since I got back from Miami, I haven’t heard a thing from Lily Sanders. Not even a letter or a message. Nothing. Something tells me she’s plotting something dangerous and if I don’t do something about it before she strikes again, I don’t know what I’m gonna do if something happens to Naomi.
Due to her nearly drowning a few weeks ago, I asked her to take a break from work and she shouldn’t worry about HR breathing down her neck. She’s always stubborn, so she refused. This morning when I saw her, she told me we needed to talk and it was important. She sounded paranoid and I knew sooner or later I had to tell her about Lily Sanders and her pregnancy rumor.
I’m fucked, I know.
” Nothing is going to happen to Naomi.” Raymond says as if he just read my mind.
” Are you fucking serious?” I sigh as I stop pacing around to stare at Raymond. ” She got poisoned, man, in a wedding with plenty of people. How could anyone get away with that? Imagine what this sick person is going to do if she has Naomi all alone.”
” I get it that you’re stressed and frustrated, but you need to calm down. Nothing is going to happen to Naomi.”
” I’m tired of lying to Naomi over and over again. I couldn’t even tell her family the truth about what happened at Keith’s wedding. How am I supposed to tell her I might have a child with a lunatic psycho killer who may or may not have poisoned her at Keith’s wedding? She’s definitely gonna break up with. I can’t even put up with my crap anymore, why would she?”
” You are taking this the wrong way.”
” Don’t give me that shit, Raymond. About a week ago, my workers were talking shit behind my back because someone decided to sell a story to a desperate journalist who’s willing to pay for it. Now, my lady got poisoned at a fucking wedding and I don’t even know how to tell her what’s really going on and you’re saying I’m taking this the wrong way? I fucking screwed up.” God, I want to punch something.
Raymond sighs and runs his hands through his hair.
” You don’t have to be here.” I say as I sit down.
” It’s okay. I really wanna help, Killian. And maybe you should tell Naomi what’s really going on before it’s too late. I think Lily hasn’t said anything, you should tell her yourself before she or whatever gender they are, tells Naomi themselves.”
” Yeah.” I sit down on my chair with my elbows on my desks as I run both my hands through my hair.
I tap my fingers restlessly on my desk, impatiently waiting for Liam’s arrival. He’s late. He’s supposed to be here to tell me something different for a change, not something that I’ve heard a million times already.
I stand up, already getting more angered at Liam for keeping me waiting.
” He’s late. I’m not paying him that huge amount of money for him to be late.”
” He will be here soon.” Raymond says.
And right on cue, Liam strides into my office with his portfolio in his hand. Raymond sits on the couch at the corner of my office with me standing behind my office desk.
” Raymond.” Liam acknowledges Raymond’s presence. Raymond nods in greeting.
Finally Liam turns to me. ” Mr. Black.”
” Sit.” I point to the chair in front of me. ” And you’re late.”
Liam unbuttons the one button in his suit jacket and then sits down. He places his portfolio on my desk as I watch him.
” Sorry, I had to handle something important and it also concerns this case of yours.”
” Right. What do you have that I haven’t heard already?”
I’m way past my patience and endurance and I need solutions already. It’s killing me that I don’t know who’s doing this and I’m not sure I’m close to finding out who’s behind all of this. Naomi might be in more danger and it’s because of me. I caused this. Maybe if I should have kept my dick in one place, this wouldn’t be happening.
” Maybe you should sit down.” Raymond says, right at the same time Liam turns to look at Raymond.
” Should he be here to hear this? I don’t know, privacy, maybe?” Liam says.
I sigh as I turn to look at Raymond who already has a face of disbelief. I get it, Liam doesn’t think it’s okay to talk about something like this with Raymond present, especially when we don’t know who’s behind all of this. I want Raymond here. I know I’m not supposed to trust anyone, but I know he’s not the one doing this. I’ve been in shitty situations countless times that I know anyone is capable of anything. But I know Raymond isn’t behind this. It’s a woman.
” I can leave if you want some privacy.” Raymond says, already standing up.
” Don’t bother. Sit.” I gesture to his seat.
Raymond nods and sits back down.
Liam looks at me for confirmation and I nod.
” Go ahead and tell me what you’ve got.” I tell Liam, with my hands thrust into my pockets.
Liam nods with a sigh and opens his portfolio. He brings out different files and settles them on my desk.
” How was the wedding, by the way?” Liam asks, sifting through files upon files.
” Not important, Liam. I’m not really in the mood for that.”
Liam looks up at me. ” Right.” Sighing, Liam continues. ” I won’t lie, I really don’t have much but I’m trying my best to dig out useful information. Hopefully, this information that I have might be helpful.”
” You don’t have much and I’ve been paying you to give me legit information this past month, Liam? I expect more from you.”
” I am genuinely trying to help you, Mr. Black. And things like this need time. Also, if we wanna know who’s doing this, you should probably try and remember.”
Is he being a smart mouth?
” Well, I don’t have time. Some shit has been going on with me and time is the last thing on my plate right now.”
” Killian, let him just tell us what he knows.” Raymond interjects.
I sigh, run my hand through my hair and sit down on my seat.
Liam clears his throat and pushes a file towards me.
” The reason I couldn’t find useful information about Anna Montgomery was because Anna Montgomery isn’t her real name. Well, it’s her name, not the name people know her as.”
” What are you talking about, Liam? Cut the bullshit. I thought we we’re here to talk about Lily Sanders and not Anna Montgomery.” I’m already fuming as I stare at Liam.
He’s surprised at my tone.
” Cool it down, man.” Raymond says from the couch he’s sitting on.
” Please, go on.” I correct my tone.
” Anna Montgomery’s real name is Gianna Haines. They’re the same person. Well, I’m not sure about this person claiming to be Lily Sanders, but Lily Sanders is Anna Montgomery’s late daughter.”
” I don’t get anything you’re saying.” I say.
Liam leans forward with his arms on my desk.
” The reason I couldn’t find useful information is because I was looking in the wrong place. You remember the house Lily Sanders was writing to you from? The same house where we found that baby’s picture?”
” Yeah?”
” The picture we saw in that house, like I told you the other time, was Anna Montgomery’s daughter who died two months before Anna died. The baby’s name was Lily Sanders.”
” What?” I’m baffled at this news.
” The baby’s real name is Lilianna Sanders and her biological mother was Anna Montgomery or if we wanna call her by her actual name, Gianna Haines.”
Fuck, why does that name ring a bell?
” I believe Gianna Haines moved to that apartment where Lily Sanders is sending you letters from. Gianna must have changed her name to Anna Montgomery in order to live there anonymously.
Montgomery is Gianna’s mother’s maiden name and I guess Anna is short for Gianna. She rented the house after the original occupants died. She was a private person, a lot of people knew nothing about her and I guess she wanted to keep it that way. She lived there, maybe with her baby. And that was five years ago.”
” What the fuck?” Raymond says. ” I need to understand something. You are saying Lily or Lilianna Sanders is a real person and she was the late Gianna Haines or Anna Montgomery’s eight months old daughter who died? What I don’t understand is, who the fuck is this person sending Killian letters? Why are they claiming to be a dead person? A child for that matter? And if Lilianna Sanders is Gianna Haines’ late daughter, why did they have a different last name? I guess Gianna’s dead, right?” Raymond asks.
I turned to look at Raymond at once the minute he said Gianna Haines was dead. How did he know Gianna was dead? I never told him she died when Liam called to relay that message to me.
” How did you know Gianna is dead?” I ask Raymond.
” What?” He feigns ignorance.
” How did you know Gianna died?” I repeat my question.
” You told me, remember?”
” I never told you.”
Raymond sighs. ” I am sorry I didn’t tell you, but I was doing my own little research. I knew she was dead.”
” And you didn’t tell me, why?”
” Because I needed to be sure.” Raymond answers.
I stare at him, thinking if Raymond’s part of this. It can’t be.
” Oh, come on. You seriously don’t think I have anything to do with this, do you?”
” I don’t know.”
” Come on, man. I wouldn’t be part of this, especially when I have nothing to gain.”
” Right.” I sigh as I turn to look at Liam. ” Who’s this Gianna Haines and how’s this person related to this woman that’s claiming to be Lily Sanders?” I ask Liam.
” Anna or Gianna used to live in Texas with her family before she moved to New York to learn fashion. Six years ago, I guess she got pregnant for someone, Killian, maybe. It is said that the baby died a few months after she was born and Anna named the child Lilianna. The baby’s last name, Sanders, is Gianna’s father’s name. I guess the baby took her father’s name as her own last name. Courtesy of not having a father. I guess the father must have walked out of their lives.” Liam says as he stares at me. ” According to my sources, the baby had a strange illness and they couldn’t save her. There isn’t any proof that the baby died, though. But, two months later, Anna took her own life by jumping into a lake. She was found dead a few days later.” Liam says.
I just stay quiet, slowly coming to terms that I really know Anna. That she was part of my life a long time ago, but I’m not ready to admit that. It can’t be the Anna that I know. Not that Anna. It can’t be. She can’t be dead.
” You’re contemplating.” Liam says as he hands me a photograph. I take it.
” That photo is proof that Anna died. I visited her grave myself. She was cremated and the body was sent to her family.” Liam continues.
I stare at the picture in my hand, at the name imprinted on the headstone. Gianna Haines. She was really gone.
I let the paper fall out of my hand as I pinch the bridge of my nose. Fuck, this can’t be happening right now. How’s my past coming back to haunt me?
” Now, to the real important information. Someone is impersonating the late Lilianna Sanders. Someone is trying to hurt you and I think this person is somehow related to Gianna Haines and her daughter. I believe whoever this person is, the person claiming to be Lily Sanders and sending you pictures and blackmailing letters, is a person close to the late Gianna. It could be Gianna’s sister, maybe an older sister. It could be a thing of revenge. It doesn’t seem to me this person wants money, and that could be because this person already has money. Whoever we’re dealing with is someone who knows you and I think they’re aware of your past.”
” Shit.” I mutter.
” Before I show you Anna’s real photo, I want to be clear about something. Does this story sound familiar to you? Did you in any way dated a woman named Lilianna Sanders six years ago? I would really appreciate the honesty right now.”
My eyes flick between Raymond and Liam as I ponder. What the hell did I get myself into? How do I begin to explain this? Everything is slowly coming back, every memory that I’ve pushed to the back of my head. I didn’t want to remember anything that reminded me of my past, and Liam coming in to tell me Lilianna is a real person and a child and that she’s dead, is starting to bring back these memories I never thought I would recover.
” And the pregnancy rumor?” I ask.
” I don’t know for sure, Mr. Black, but I think maybe this person is really pregnant for you or they’re using this pregnancy rumor to try and make you remember your past. Maybe they want you to remember something. There might be a possibility that Lilianna Sanders might be alive and well.”
Fuck. Did Anna really have a child? If she did, then I’m really fucked.
” You said her last name is Sanders. Lilianna?” Raymond speaks up.
” Yes.”
” Celine’s last name is Sanders. If I could remember the few times we’ve had any conversation is that, she grew up in Texas and she had a sister. If there’s someone out there using a dead girl’s name to seek revenge, it sure would be the dead girl’s sister. And Celine fit right into all that description. Rich and smart. She’s been looking for any means to work in this company and to be close to you, Killian. What if it’s Celine all along?” Raymond says.
My attention isn’t really here. I’m trying to figure out what I did that would make anyone, anyone who knew Anna try to want to hurt me. She’s supposed to be my past, how is she trying to fuck me over after all these years? And also, this could all be a coincidence. Anna could be anywhere in the world right now living her best life. I can’t remember hurting Anna to the extent someone would want to exact revenge using her or anyone close to her. If anything, I really liked Anna even before things went sideways. And I showed her how I really felt about her.
This could be a different person entirely. But why is my mind telling me otherwise?
” Does this Celine have red hair?” Liam asks.
” Yes. Celine is a redhead.”
” Where’s her photo?” I ask.
Liam looks through his portfolio and pulls out a photograph.
” So, this is her photo. Anna Montgomery or Gianna Haines, whatever you know her as.” Liam pushes a large photograph towards me.
I pick it up as I lean against my seat and observe the photo. The picture isn’t that clear, it’s more of a bad camera or bad photographer problem.
” This is Anna?” I ask, baffled at how peaceful she looks and how familiar she looks.
” Yes.”
In the photo, it looks like she’s standing in a park, wearing a gray knitted, turtleneck sweater. She has red hair, like natural red hair, with the front cut out as bangs. The rest of her hair is in wavy curls, and her hair is really long. It goes past her shoulders to her mid back. It’s a half photo, with the photo showing just from her mid-thigh up. Anna wasn’t staring at the camera when the photo was taken. Something else got her attention and it got her smiling brightly as she crossed her arms. She has green eyes and fair skin. Anna is beautiful and so – I don’t even know the exact words to use.
” Oh, fuck.” I mutter, dropping the photograph on my desk as I stand up.
Raymond stands up and walks towards my desk. He stands next to Liam and picks up the pictures.
” Does she look familiar?” Liam asks.
” I…” I’m short of words as I run both hands through my hair.
” Killian, did you know her?” Raymond asks this time.
” How the fuck did this happen? How? Anna died?” Oh my God.
” So you know her?” Liam asks.
I can’t look anybody in the eye. The minute I stared at the photo, I knew I would know her. I knew there was something familiar about her. There was no way I could ever forget that smile even if I tried. I just can’t. And that sweater, that knitted, turtle neck sweater, I fucking bought her that sweater.
And she’s dead? Fuck, did I cause that?
” Killian, talk to us. What is going on?” Raymond looks concerned.
But none of that matters now. None of it matters anymore. I’ve never felt broken and disgusted by myself before. I let this happen. This is my fault. I hurt her, I hurt her like I hurt every other woman before and after her.
Fuck, I’m a monster.
” I was… I – fuck!” God, I want to punch something really badly.
I needed to punch something. I want to scream and just hit something, maybe that might be a temporary solution to the heavy weight in my heart.
” Killian, do you need a minute?” Raymond asks.
” What the fuck? She’s dead? How? Did I do this?” I’m beginning to panic because I knew what I did to her six years ago. Everything is starting to come back to my memory.
All these years, especially after Club K was launched, everything that has to do with my youth, every mistake I made, every fucked up that I fucked up, I buried them deep in my head making sure to never bring them back. They were my past and I made sure of that.
” Did you know her?” Liam asks.
On a normal day, I wouldn’t give a shit. But not Anna. She was great, she was innocent, pure, she had a beautiful soul, and all of that was the reason I had to walk away. And the day this photo was taken, was the day I broke her heart. I was at the park with her when a shitty photographer took a photo of her. She was staring at me when the photo was taken. And that was the day I let her go. That was the day she gave me the news. She was so happy, but I took that happiness away from her when I told her I wouldn’t be there for them, because I didn’t want to.
And now she’s dead?
God, I feel shittier than I’ve ever felt. If I was in my house, I would have jumped inside my swimming pool already just to try and get rid of this memory.
” Kil, what is going on?” Raymond is by my side as he stares at me. ” What aren’t you telling us?”
” I’m gonna go.” I grab my suit jacket and put it on.
” See yourselves out.” I tell both men as I hurry out of my office, not before hearing Raymond ask:
” What the fuck was that?”