Mute 32
Chapter 32
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Caspian’s POV,
I stood in front of the mirror, glaring at my reflection. The suit I had on felt suffocating, the collar too tight, the fabric too stiff. It was the third suit I had tried on, and none of them felt right. None of this felt right.
“Next, I barked, barely suppressing my anger. The tailor scrambled to bring another option, his hands shaking slightly. I caught a glimpse of Elijah in the mirror, standing off to the side, concern etched on his face.
“Maybe this one, Alpha,” the tailor stammered, holding up a dark blue suit with trembling hands.
I snatched it from him and tore off the previous suit, muttering curses under my breath. “This better be the one,” I growled, slipping into the new jacket. It felt just as wrong as the others.
“How about this, Caspian?” Elijah asked, trying to sound calm and reasonable. “Maybe take a break, clear your head?”
I whipped around to face him, my temper flaring. “Shut the fuck up, Elijah! Just shut up and leave me alone!” I could see the shock on his face, but I didn’t care. The inside me was like a storm, and he was just another casualty in its path.
e anger
The other men in the room, my closest advisors and friends, looked stunned. They had never seen me like this. Hell, I had never seen myself like this. But something was gnawing at me from the inside, a deep, unshakable uncase. The thought of marrying Ellen made my skin crawl, yet it was my decision. Or at least it had been. Now, it felt like I was being dragged to the altar against my will.
Elijah took a step forward, his voice softer but still firm. “Caspian, we’re just trying to help-”
“Help?” I interrupted, my voice dripping with sarcasm. “You think this is helping? Parading me around in these ridiculous suits for a wedding I don’t even want?” I ripped off the jacket and threw it across the room, where it landed in a crumpled heap.
The tailor looked like he wanted to disappear his face pale. “Alpha, I-
“Get out,” I snapped, cutting him off. “All of you, just get out!”
They hesitated, exchanging worried glances, but one by one, they filed out of the room. Elijah was the last to go, lingering by the door. “We’ll be right outside if you need us,” he
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said, his voice heavy with concern.
“Don’t hold your breath,” I muttered, turning away from him.
When the door finally closed behind them, I was left alone with my thoughts. I ran a hand through my hair, my heart pounding in my chest. This wasn’t me. I wasn’t the kind of leader who lost control like this. But lately, everything had been wrong.
1 sat down heavily on the edge of the bed, my head in my hands. Ellen. The woman. had chosen to be my Luna. It made sense on paper–she was strong, beautiful, and ambitious. But where was the spark? The connection that should have been there? Instead, all I felt was a growing dread.
A knock on the door snapped me out of my thoughts. I didn’t bother to answer. A moment later, Elijah poked his head in, cautiously.
“Caspian,” he began, “I know you’re under a lot of pressure. But this isn’t like you. Wh really going on?”
I sighed, feeling the weight of the world pressing down on me. “I don’t know, Elijah. I thought this was what I wanted. I chose Ellen because she seemed perfect for the role. But now, everything feels… wrong. Like I’m making the biggest mistake of my life.”
Elijah stepped inside and closed the door behind him. “You’re the Alpha, Caspian. If something doesn’t feel right, you have the power to change it.”
“It’s not that simple,” I said, frustration lacing my words. “The pack expects this. Ellen expects this. Hell, I convinced myself it was the right thing to do. But now? I don’t ever know anymore.”
Elijah crossed the room and sat beside me. “The pack wants a strong, decisive leader. It you marry Ellen and you’re miserable, they will see that. They will sense your doubt and hesitation. But if you follow your heart, they will respect you even more for it.”
I looked at him, searching for answers in his steady gaze. “And what if following my heart leads to chaos?”
“Then we’ll face it together,” he said simply. “But you deserve to be happy, Caspian. You owe it to yourself and to the pack to make the right choice, not the easy one.”
I nodded slowly, feeling some of the tension ease. “Thanks, Elijah. I needed to hear that.”
He smiled, clapping me on the shoulder. “Anytime. Now, let’s find you a suit that doesn’t make you want to murder everyone in the room, okay?”
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I chuckled, the sound suprising even myself “Deal”
As Elijah opened the door to call the others back in, I took a deep breath, trying to shake off the lingering doubts. I didn’t have all the answers, but for now, I would take it one step at a time. And maybe, just maybe, I would find a way to set things right.
That evening. I found myself at the training grounds, overseeing a drill with some of the younger pack members. It was important to keep everyone in top shape, especially with the looming threats from neighboring packs. As I barked orders and corrected stances, the physical exertion did little to quell the turmoil in my mind.
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“Again!” I shouted, watching as the young wolves moved through the combat sequence. “Your form is sloppy, Thomas. Keep your guard up!”
I walked along the line, adjusting positions and offering encouragement. Despite my stern demeanor, I knew they looked up to me, and I wanted to instill discipline and confidence in them.
Just as the drill was winding down, one of my trusted scouts, Jared, approached me. His expression was a mix of urgency and caution, which piqued my interest.
“Alpha,” he said, bowing slightly. “May I have a word?”
I nodded, signaling the end of the drill. “Take a break, everyone. We’ll resume in ten.”
Jared waited until the trainees had dispersed before speaking. “I have news from the
resort.
My heart skipped a beat. “Go on,” I urged, trying to keep my voice steady.
“Aria is doing well, sir,” Jared reported. “She’s participating in the activities and seems to be enjoying her stay. The staff say she’s adapting nicely.”
A wave of calmness washed over me, a rare feeling these days. “That’s good to hear, I said, nodding. “Thank you for the update, Jared. You’re dismissed.”
Jared nodded and left, leaving me alone with my thoughts. I missed Aria more than I wanted to admit, but I knew I had to keep my distance. I couldn’t trust myself around her, not anymore. The bond we shared, the history between us–no one knew about it, not even Elijah, my beta. It was a secret I had to bear alone.
Elijah
Casp Proached me, noting the change in my demeanor. “Everything alright,
I forced a smile. “Just received some good news about the resort. Aria’s doing well.”
Elijah nodded, his eyes studying me. “That’s great. She deserves some peace.”
“She does,” I agreed, though my mind was already elsewhere. “Let’s get back to the drills. We can’t afford to slack off.”
As we resumed training, I couldn’t shake the image of Aria from my mind. Her laugh, her strength, her resilience. I wanted to see her, to make sure she was truly happy, but I couldn’t risk it. Not now.
After the training session ended, I headed back to my office, my thoughts still
consumed by Aria. Sitting at my desk, I found it hard to focus on the reports in front of me. I knew I was doing the right thing by keeping my distance, but it didn’t make it any
easier.
Later that night, as I sat alone in my room, I allowed myself a moment of vulnerability. “Damn it, Aria,” I whispered to the empty room. “Why did things have to be complicated?”
A part of me wanted to ride to the resort and see her, to ensure she was truly happy. But I knew I couldn’t. I had responsibilities, duties that couldn’t be ignored. And Aria needed space to heal, to find her own path.
As we gathered around the table for dinner, the weight of the impending wedding hung heavy in the air. Ellen’s efforts to portray affection were obvious, her touches overly deliberate, as if she were trying to convince not just me, but everyone around us, of our supposed low wer
Her hand reached across the table, fingers grazing mine in an attempt at intimacy. But instead of warmth, all I felt was a suffocating pressure, as if her touch threatened to crush me under its weight. I couldn’t bring myself to reciprocate, instead finding ways to subtly evade her advances.
The tension was thick, a silent proof of discomfort playing out beneath the polite conversation. I could sense the eyes of our families on us, the expectation and scrutiny. Ellen, ever the skilled performer, tried to play off my aloofness with practiced ease.
gazes heavy with
“Oh, Caspian’s just exhausted from all the wedding preparations,” she chimed in, her voice dripping with false concern. “He’s been working so hard to make everything perfect for our special day.”
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Her words were like a slap in the face, a stark reminder of the facade we were both trapped in. I wanted to scream, to shatter the illusion and reveal the truth to everyone at the table. But I remained silent, biting back the words that threatened to spill from my lips.
As Ellen continued her charade, I felt a surge of anger rising within me. She didn’t care about my feelings, about the doubts and skepticism that gnawed at me from within. All she cared about was the title of Luna, the status and power that came with it.
In
that moment, I realized just how trapped I was, how suffocating the weight of duty and obligation could be.