Love for the Librarian

After class I start to walk home. I figure that I will get my car to go to Katelyn’s. That is pretty much the only time I ever use the thing. I am walking home when a car pulls up next to me. It parks and I hear someone get out. Soon I am joined by Dylan.

“What do you want? I mean really you got what you wanted. I don’t see the point in keeping this up.” I am just getting exhausted by this whole thing.

He grabs my arm and stops me. “Riley, you haven’t let me explain anything. Now I see you making dates with other guys. How is that fair to me?”

I glare at him, “Fair to you. How fair is it to me to be harassed by your girlfriend every chance she gets? How is it fair to me to have you harassing me every chance that you get? How is it fair to me to have to see you with Brittney sprawled all over you all the time? I think I am being more than fair. It is you who needs to back off and get your girlfriend off my back.”

“Riley, I don’t want to back off. I told you I wanted you. Why can’t you believe me?”

“Actions speak louder than words. I am not competing with Brittney for anything, even a friend.” I pull my arm from his grasp.

“I never asked you to compete with her. I don’t want her.”

I roll my eyes then turn to walk away from him. “Prove it.”

“I would if you would just let me.”

“We shall see.” I keep walking leaving Dylan behind. Then he jogs up to me.

“Give me the week to show you that I don’t want Brittney. Please just let me show you.” He pulls me to him so that I have no choice but to look in his eyes. He looks so sincere I am having a hard time keeping my resolve.

“Fine, I will give you the week. You prove to me that you don’t want Brittney, then we will talk.” I can see the smile spread across his lips. Then he leans into me. I pull back.

“Prove it first.”

He looks disappointed, “I guess that’s a no to the date then?”

“That’s right. I am in no rush to look like a fool again.”

He still hasn’t let go of me. “Do you know what torture it was to see you give your number to that guy? Do you know what torture it was for me to watch you walk around like that all day? Do you know how badly I wanted to punch Mr. Harman in the face when he told me to leave you alone?”

“You made your bed now lie in it.”

“Please just one kiss. I am dying here.”

He is so close now that I am having a hard time catching my breath. I shake my head to clear it. “More reason to prove it.” He lets out a groan.

“Fine, Will I see you this weekend?”

“I doubt it. I am going to be at Katelyn’s with Kevin. We are studying for finals.” I pull away from him. “They are waiting for me.”

I head home leaving Dylan behind. I have to admit that was one of the hardest things I have ever done. I had to keep focusing on the embarrassment that I felt seeing him with Brittney. A stupid part of me still wanted to kiss him. Still wanted to put my arms around him and let the world fade away. He is the only one who has ever had that power over me. It is like a drug that you can’t quit. I really do hope that he proves me wrong this week.

When I get home, my mom is there. She is sitting in the living room. She looks a little lost in space. “Hey, mom, what’s up?”

She shakes her head and comes back to reality. “Hey, honey, your home. I thought you would be at the library.”

“Actually I came to get some clothes. I am going to be having a study weekend with Katelyn for finals.”

“That boy isn’t going to be there is he? Polly told me that he was studying with you.” She gives me a stern look.

“No, I am not really talking to him right now. That was why I needed a girls night last night. He went back to his ex-girlfriend. Or at least that’s what it looked like yesterday. He is trying to say that it isn’t what it was, but I don’t want to be the fool you know.” I sit by my mom on the couch. “You didn’t answer me. What’s up?”

“Oh, your father came by to get some things. We argued a bit. No big deal. I mean I already knew it was over, it is just a little much to see him pulling his things out of the house.” I can hear the hurt in her voice. As much as she is putting on a strong face for me, I know this hurts her. She really did love dad.

“I hear ya. Dylan keeps cornering me telling me it isn’t over, but I think it is. It is just hurting being in this in between.”

“Is he pressuring you, honey?” There is the concern.

I shake my head. “No, he is just persistent. I just don’t know if I should put myself out there again. It did hurt when I saw them together.”

“What exactly did you see? Were they kissing?” She raises her eyebrow at me.

“No, she had her hands all over him and he was smiling at her.”

“Maybe there is something else. Maybe he was laughing at her. Or maybe it is what you think it is. It is an iffy thing. What did he say afterwards?”

I shrug. “Nothing, he just came up and put his arm around me at my locker.”

“So, you are thinking that he didn’t know that you saw him with this other girl.”

“Yeah, so he was trying to play me. It would make sense. I mean he is one of the most popular guys in school, not exactly the type of guy to be falling over me.”

“Honey, have you looked at yourself? You are a very attractive girl. I am sure you turned quite a few heads today, wearing Katelyn’s clothes. You didn’t even have to try too hard to get looks that girls are killing themselves for. You don’t ever forget that you are a beautiful girl, you don’t need some guy to make you feel that way.”

“I know mom. I really don’t care how I look. I never really cared at all before. He made me feel wanted. I guess I liked that. Anyway, I am going to pack up for the weekend and I will see you on Monday.”

“Alright honey, I might have a girls night with Polly. It sounds like you had fun.” She has a huge grin on her face.

“I did, Katelyn gets me.” Giving her a smile to let her know that I am not totally lost and can still have fun with my friends. I get up and head towards my room.

“I am sure her parents not being home is a plus.” I stop in my steps.

I turn to look at her. “How did you know?”

“Small town baby, just be careful. And tell that other boy to keep his hands to himself.” She smirks at me.

“I will mom. Thanks for understanding.” I try to push as much gratitude out of my voice as I can.

“Of course dear. I was eighteen once. I know you do things that are maybe not the best things. I just ask that you be safe. I know you are a good girl.”

“Thanks mom.” I come over and hug her from the back of the couch.

“If you do decide to be with a boy you know to use protection right?”

“Mom!” I jumped up out of shock.

“What that is something I am supposed to ask.”

“I am still a virgin mom. When I do decide that I am going to do that then I promise I will use protection. Ok, now can we never talk about this again.” I shudder in horror, I was just talking to my mom about my sex life. Or the nonexistent sex life that I have.

“That is all that you needed to say. Go have fun at Katelyn’s. I will see you on Monday.” She gives me a laugh. She thinks my reaction is funny. God the humiliation.

I step into my room and catch a look at myself, I do look good. I never looked earlier. Katelyn’s clothes catch my curves just right, it looks awesome. I look away and grab a bag. I really need to get back into my own clothes. I throw in clothes for the weekend. Also an outfit for Monday morning. I am not wearing Katelyn’s clothes to school again. I do not need the looks. I might change my look a bit after school though.