Hiding the Alpha’s Heir

Desmond

My hands were fidgeting right now as Anderson had taken care of the unconscious Seraphina. I was forced to leave the room as I kept pacing back and forth.

Seraphina… She was bleeding…

This was my fault… This was my fault again…

“If something happens to them, I am not going to forgive myself…” I cursed myself, clutching my hair in distress.

I hurt her again… I hurt her again…

How many times did I have to hurt her again? I… I had never done something to make her happy since she was here back in my pack.

Damn it! Where did I go wrong?

I clutched my chest, wondering where it all started. At that moment, I realized where it was.

The time I slept with Hazel…

“It’s my fault…” I said mindlessly as I slowly slumped to the floor, feeling more guilty than ever.

“Papa! Papa! What happened to Mama?”

I felt myself being shaken by someone. Glistening in tears, I looked up and sniffed the scent of my son.

“Sander…” I didn’t wait for my son as I hugged him so tight. I couldn’t contain my tears, worried about what could have happened to my mate.

I promised that I would never hurt her again. But here I was… Seraphina and our second baby pup were in trouble.

“What happened to Mama? Is she alright?” Sander asked as he made me look at him. “Papa…” He caressed my cheek to console him when I told him that his Mama and his baby sibling were in trouble.

Moments later, Anderson stormed out of the room as more of his assistants were still tending to Seraphina who was already sleeping peacefully.

“Can we see her now? Is she alright? Is our baby pup alright?” I didn’t waste any time asking.

Anderson took a toll breath before he nodded. “I managed to stop her bleeding and save your pup along with Lady Seraphina, Alpha. But you cannot see her for now. She is already resting.”

I sighed heavily before I nodded, feeling relieved. “That is good to hear…” I couldn’t help hugging my son when he was hugging my thigh. “Mama is alright now, son.” Sander nodded, sighing in relief.

Seraphina… She said that she would never forgive me if something happened to our pup.

“Can we talk alone, Alpha?” Anderson asked after that. His expression was earnest. It looked like he meant business.

“Certainly.” I nodded and turned at Sander who was already frowning. I looked at the two butlers I assigned to my son. They were bound to follow and protect him no matter where Sander went. “Franklin, Jeremy.”

The two of them immediately bowed. “Yes, Alpha?”

“Escort Sander now to the manor.”

“But I also want to stay here.” Sander frowned more.

I knelt on one knee and held him on his shoulders. “Once Mama wakes up, you can stay with her. Alright?”

Hesitant, Sander nodded. “Fine…” He kissed my cheek. “Good night, Papa,” he said in a dejected tone. He turned his back. “Let’s go, Jeremy, Franklin.” Sander sighed.

“Yes, young master,” they said in unison.

I waited for them to leave before I looked at Anderson with an earnest expression. “What do you want to say that you cannot discuss with my son?” I stood up, feeling nervous right now.

Anderson released a sigh and ushered me to sit which I did. “I did not want to beat around the bush but Alpha…” he paused. It was as if he was weighing if he was going directly or not. “You are the triggering factor why Lady Seraphina almost had a miscarriage with your second pup.”

“What?” My eyes widened. I could feel the blood from my face suddenly drain from me as soon as he said that.

I suddenly remembered what she said that she almost had a miscarriage when she was conceiving Sander.

I was really the triggering factor of Seraphina’s stress… Was that it? Because… Seraphina found out that I slept with Hazel that was why she absconded from my pack.

“I spoke to Lady Seraphina when she woke up earlier.” I gasped at his words. Seraphina woke up earlier? “I asked her how it turned out that she ended up bleeding. I even asked her if she happened to hurt her hips to something hard.”

That was the time my heart dropped. Seraphina fell to the floor when I slapped her…

“I-It was an accident… I didn’t mean to hurt her.” I didn’t mean to slap her…

“Looks like you know you were at fault.” I looked at Anderson who looked unhappy. “Alpha, I would be executed if I say this but… you are not good for Lady Seraphina’s pregnancy.”

“Insolence!” I growled, couldn’t accept what he said. “Why are you saying that? How did I become that I wasn’t good for Seraphina’s pregnancy?” Who was he to tell me that? He was just a pack doctor!

Anderson looked faltering right now. Using my Alpha tone was enough to frighten someone. But still, he mustered up his courage before he spoke again. “You have done so many things to torment her as your mate and in her pregnancy. This wasn’t the only time she experienced that she felt her stomach in pain. She consulted me so many times during her pregnancy.”

Then it hit me. Seraphina had told me earlier that she consulted Anderson because she felt pain in her stomach. Was that it? Was that the start?

“I already said before to you that any distress can cause her miscarriage.” I clenched my hands after that. I know that… I know that for a fact. “And now, I happened to know that you are the one who caused her more stress.” I was about to defend myself and would get angry at him but Anderson spoke coldly. “You do not deserve Lady Seraphina, Alpha Desmond. All you did was hurt her.” He stood up. “This is not you, Alpha. You would never do something to hurt her. You love her so much but why is she hurting ever since she returned to our pack?” Tears started cascading down my eyes when he asked me that. “Where is our Luna Seraphina that looked so in love with you? All she has right now is hatred and her heart is always in pain. I say this because she told me.” He shook his head. “Alpha, you disappointed Lady Seraphina so many times. I don’t think she would want you again.”

I was left in a daze when Anderson left.

It was making me feel sick knowing that I had gotten to know Seraphina’s feelings. How much more if she said those things right in front of me?

“And do you think you are not hurting me? Have you ever questioned yourself how many times you have hurt me and you haven’t done any single thing to ‘reconcile’ with me? You cannot even answer me properly!”

Seraphina’s words echoed in my mind. That was the moment I felt more guilty and realized that I hurt her so many times…

All this time, I had hurt her… Shit…

How could I not realize that?!

Had I said sorry to her and shown my sincerity to her?

The promise of making her happy in our marriage… Did I even fulfill it? No… I never fulfilled it.

All I did was hurt the love of my life.

“It is my fault…” I mumbled, smiling bitterly. I stood up, wanting to see Seraphina in the room she was staying in.

As soon as I entered, I couldn’t help but feel more guilty than before seeing that she was creasing her forehead as if she was battling something in her sleep.

“Seraphina…” I mumbled her name, calling her as I sat next to her. I held her hand. “Seraphim… I am really such a bastard to you…” I bit my lower lip as I kissed the back of her hand. “I am sorry, seraphim. You are already hurting because of me…”

My eyes darted to her stomach which was already growing. I couldn’t help getting more emotional seeing how Seraphina almost lost our second pup. If something happened to our second pup, Seraphina would never forgive me again.

It was my fault…

I realized that I never made things right for her. I was… selfish. I had never done it to make her happy.

I only did what was to manipulate everything so she could return here. I just wanted to be with her. I didn’t know that my actions were already hurting her.

Fool!

I was aware that she was already hurting but I still ended up hurting her more.

Seraphina was right. If I did not return… If I did not take them back here… Would it have turned out differently? Would Seraphina be happier?

“But I cannot take it if I am not with you again. Watching you from afar for seven years was too painful for me to bear, Seraphina…” I mumbled as if I was talking to her while I let the tears fall from my eyes. “I am sorry…” I held her hand so tight as I buried my face in her palm. “I am sorry, Seraphina… I am sorry for hurting you… I ruined the promises I made. I broke them…”

Even though we were already divorced, I was still holding on to the promises I made when we married. But it looked like I failed her.

No. Not looked like. I really failed her. I even hurt her. I hurt her more because of my actions.

She had never been happy ever since I committed a sin towards her. I have hurt my seraphim.

I didn’t deserve her after all…

Seraphina… I was a selfish moron to you.