HER EVERY FANTASY

Favour shrugged and helped herself to a second pastry. ‘I feel hungry all the time. Must be my hormones getting out of balance or something.’

Again her sister rattled on, leaving Jasmine to wonder how many lies she would end up telling. Deceit did not sit comfortably with her. Better to avoid meetings like this until she was ready to confront everyone with the truth.

It was a relief when Leonard arrived, lilting the onus of a one-on-one conversation with Favour. Though again Jasmine found herself wracked with envy at the love so openly expressed between her sister and brother-in-law in their greeting and manner to each other.

Worse was their mutual exhilaration in having a baby on the way. Favour preened as Leonard fussed over her, adoring the mother of his child, only too eager to watch over her every comfort and carry out her every pleasure.

So it should be, Jasmine savagely told herself, and if that was not her lot it was because of the choices she’d made and it was now up to her to get used to not having the whole rosy package. Glasses of champagne were ordered and brought to their table. She forced herself to make appropriate toasts, to smile and laugh in all the right places, and was doing fine until Leonard brought up Collins name.

‘Hey! Did you hear the news about Collins?’ he tossed out, grinning from ear to ear.

She shook her head, not trusting herself to speak in a tone of mild interest.

‘He won the BAFTA award for Special Visual Effects in London last night. It was in the newspaper this morning. He’s really scooping the pool this year. The film he worked on scored Best Picture Drama in the Golden Globes. Only the Academy Award to go.’

‘He’s bound to win it,’ Favour chimed in. ‘You know, Leonard, given the bigrush of what’s happening for him, it was really good of Collins to drop everything and come to our wedding.’

‘Sure was,’ he agreed.

Jasmine loosened her throat enough to ask, ‘Have you heard from him since then?’

‘No. Don’t expect to until he lands back home,’ came the matter-of-fact reply.

‘I thought… as old friends…’

‘We’ll chew over it all when we meet up again.’ Leonard grinned. ‘It’s only women who can’t wait to share everything over the phone.’

Favour laughed and playfully punched him on the arm. ‘You’re not to go ga-ga over the phone bill again.’

‘It was only the shock of it, sweetheart. I’ll be expecting it next time and won’t even blink. Promise.’

‘So, are you expecting Collins back soon?’ Jasmine pressed, unable to leave the subject alone, craving some personal news of him or a reason to hope…

Leonard shrugged. ‘The way things are lining up for him, it would only be a flying visit when and if he comes. Like for the wedding. In and out.’

He’d been in and out her life twice. No promises for a third time, yet with Leonard now married to her sister, another connection might happen.

If it was months from now and he visited Leonard , he could well find out his old friend’s sister-in-law was pregnant. A year on and he could hear she’d had a child. Would he put two and two together? And then what?

If he ignored the news, then there was no hope of any future with him.

Yet if he came to her… Jasmine’s heart began to quiver at that possibility. His child… would he feel he had to offer financial support?

Take up visiting rights? The future was suddenly a minefield that could explode in her face if Collins took a terrible negative attitude towards her for what she’d done.

‘Did you call him?’ Favour asked, then added when Jasmine looked at her with raised eyebrows. ‘I mean Collins. The other night when you called to ask for his number. Did you get to speak to him?’

Jasmine shook her head.

‘Why not?’

‘I had some work stuff to do and then I forgot about calling’ she lied again. God.. How long could she keep up with this.

‘Jasmine…’ Favour called her again. She was eyeing her with concern, a slight frown drawing her brows together. It jolted Jasmine into smoothing out her own expression, hiding any stress she might have inadvertantly shown.

‘Sorry… wool-gathering. Did I miss something?’ she asked brightly.

‘No.’ Favour grimaced. ‘You just looked a bit lonely and lost. It made me think…’

‘Favour , I’m tired. It was a hard day at work and I think the champagne’s gone to my head. If you and Leonard don’t mind, I’ll head off home now and leave you to celebrate together.’ She started to rise from her chair.

‘No… wait! I need to say this.’ Determined purpose in her sister’s voice.

Stifling a frustrated sigh, Jasmine sank onto the cushioned seat again, hoping not to be held up much longer. Her nerves were frayed from keeping up a happy facade.

‘What’s so pressing?’ she asked, trying for a note of indulgence.

‘Maybe I did wrong by you last year,’ came the worried reply.

Jasmine looked blankly at her, desperately hiding her inner churning.

Oh damn. If Favour brought up the blind date with Collins…

‘I truly believed Robert was bad for you, bui that was your business and I shouldn’t have interfered, telling you stuff you didn’t want to hear.’

Jasmine held her breath, not knowing where this was leading.

‘I guess everyone’s different,’ Favour mused. ‘Maybe we don’t get to pick whom we love. They just complement something in us…’ She sighed.

‘Anyhow, I just want to say if there’s any chance of you getting back with Robert, don’t let my opinion stop you. I had no right to…’

‘Robert?’ The name burst from Jasmine in almost hysterical relief. ‘Oh believe me. There’s no way in the world I’d ever want to get back with Robert.’

‘No?’ Favour asked, clearly surprised.

‘No!’ Jasmine replied

‘Then why haven’t you…? I mean, you’ve shown no interest in anyone else and I thought… Who am I to judge what suits you best?’

Jasmine summoned up a rueful smile. ‘Not Robert, I promise you. Stop worrying about me, Favour. I’ll make my own way.’

She pushed onto her feet again, shaking her head fondly at the newly wed couple. ‘Be happy for you. I am.’ This time she made good her escape.

She collected her car from the opera house car park and with the evening peak-hour traffic well and truly over, it was a hassle-tree drive home to Randwick. It felt good to close her apartment door and shut the rest of the world out.