FORBIDDEN AFFECTIONS: ADDICTED TO MY STEPMOM

Since childhood, Jack has been an obedient and responsible child. Whenever he wished for something he knew would be difficult or take an extraneous time to reach, he would work hard for it, giving it all the best efforts and patience he could gather while waiting for the right time to grab it.

Jack was a selfless and extremely patient person. That’s why these past few days when he was showing more of his selfish side, I couldn’t help but feel conflicted emotions in my heart. A part of me knew I had longed to see this authentic side, yet, another part of me also felt concerned about him and how I couldn’t meet his desires properly.

But then again, this was Jack, the person I loved in and out. And this kind of change coming from him, I could understand and accept.

Although I would want Jack to understand that I wouldn’t leave him. There were times when he would look at me as if he was scared that I would suddenly disappear. I wanted him to know that that would not happen, that I love and cherish him just as much as he does for me.

If only he could see right through my heart…

Jack was currently sound asleep next to me. It was late at night and our daughter Amy was asleep in her crib. I couldn’t help but stare at Jack’s face.

I parted a strand of hair that touched his eyes and then softly stroked his forehead. My thoughts began to drift as my fingers leaned more on his hair, gently stroking his strands.

What should I do to make our lives peaceful? What should I do to keep Jack from getting upset? Lately, he has been too agitated and it shows through his words. He’s worrying a lot about our family… Is this something we can really do together?

Sighing, I was about to get up to head to the kitchen and drink some water when I suddenly felt someone holding my hand.

“Why are you still awake?” Jack asked me with his voice soft and sleepy.

I smiled and gave a gentle squeeze of his hand. “I feel thirsty. Do you want a glass too?”

Jack shook his head, looking at me with his sleepy eyes as he softly replied, “Come back soon, mom.” Jack let out a breath and kissed my hand before he let me go.

I couldn’t help but smile at the small action. I gently stroked his head again before standing up and heading to the kitchen to drink some water.

While drinking I suddenly heard a sound coming from the living area. I immediately went to it and noticed my phone on a sofa. I can’t help but wonder because it was already late and it wasn’t like I was expecting a call or message at this time.

Curious, I opened it and read the content.

“Marianne, can we meet up and talk?”ー Ryan

It has been a few days since the day Jack went to see Ryan. Fortunately, I was able to stop him just in time, before he told Ryan what the real relationship he has with me. Additionally, by pure luck, Ryan didn’t hear us in that car… Well, at least that was what I thought since the following day, he visited my shop and again asked me about my decision on the contract.

I appreciated him a lot. He was kind and I could see how he truly wanted to help me and my family. And because of that, I came to the decision to finally tell him what I felt for him. And ask him, as gently as I could, to stop liking me.

I immediately replied to Ryan’s message, suggesting we should meet tomorrow at a coffee shop. He replied immediately and asked to meet at a hotel bar, the place where we first met and dined together as per Jonah’s matchmaking arrangement. After carefully assessing the situation and thinking we were both adults and had become friends somehow, I eventually agreed.

“Are you really going to reject Ryan, mars? Is that your final decision?” Jonah asked me when she visited my shop.

“It’s hard to find a man willing to take care of you, do you know that? We’re not getting younger, mars,” Jonah further commented.

I know my best friend’s concern for me is also genuine and I’m thankful for that. I just smiled and proceeded to arrange the flowers to be delivered for today. “I have Aki. Amy and I will be okay with him around.”

“Hmm … I know your son loves you very much. But mars, what if he decides to marry again? Of course, he’ll also build his own home – his family, right? I’m not saying he will abandon you and Amy, he’s not that kind of person. What I mean is he’s at that age that he’ll get to know a lot of different people kinds of women. Sooner or later, he’ll find someone he wants to date, and later on, I don’t know, marry?”

I was stunned by what Jonah said but she spoke again before I could even think hard and respond.

“What if he decides to get back together with his ex-wife? Unlike our past relationships and failures in marriages, he and his ex-wife are still young. If they want, they can get back together and throw those divorce papers in a blink of an eye,” said Jonah. “I don’t want to overthink, mars, but what if the two of them talk and get back together… What will happen to you and Amy then?”

I thought about what Jonah said. I know Jack doesn’t like Crista. According to him, he has cut all ties with Crista. He also said he has no plans to meet and talk to her again…

But I also know the power of living together under one roof. Whether the time was long or short, it held power. Also, Jonah was right in saying that at Jack’s age he would get to know many different kinds of women.

I couldn’t help but let out a shaky breath as I tried to clear my mind of worries about Jack. In the end, I couldn’t respond to Jonah’s words and just changed our topic.

After I delivered the last batch of flowers ordered I headed to the restaurant bar where Ryan and I would meet. As usual, he was already sitting at a table for two, the patience and gentleness evident on his face.

While eating, I took the courage to finally open the subject I wanted to speak with him. “I think it’s been a year since we came here. Time surely flies…” Ryan smiled but before he could speak, I immediately added, “Ryan, I… I want to thank you for everything you’ve done for me and my family.”

“Marianne, you know what makes you happy makes me happy too. You know, between us, these words of thanks shouldn’t exist,” Ryan said to me with a grin.

“I just want to thank you because you deserve it. And I…. I’m here so we can talk properly. ” I took in a deep breath and broke it to him softly, “I really appreciate your kindness and affection for me… However, I would ask you now to stop.”

Ryan was silent for a moment then he laughed a little, “Is this you rejecting me?” The smile on Ryan’s face turned sad as he looked at me, his eyes clear and gentle as his words were. “Marianne, are you really sure of this? You know Amy is growing up. She needs a father in her life. And I’m willing to be that person. For her, and for you too. I don’t want you to suffer in the future. Being alone… It’s harder than you think. I know you have been through a lot in the past and might say you can do it again, but the thing is, I’m here. And I want to help you face everything. Together.”

I looked at him directly this time, “You don’t have to worry about that. I have Aki-”

“Marianne, Jack isn’t going to be by your side forever. You know that deep inside yourself,” Ryan said. Both he and Jonah were saying the same things which made me feel as if something was stuck in my throat and stomach.

“What if one day, he and his wife just get back together and leave you again?” Ryan added which added to the strange nervousness I was feeling.

I know Jack loves me and he won’t leave Amy and me. We are his family. But why am I so concerned about what I’m hearing now?

“Marianne, let me just continue helping you,” Ryan insisted once more.

“No … Aki won’t leave us, I know him better than you do. If you’ll excuse me, I still have a lot to do. I need to go home,” I said firmly and stood up.

But suddenly Ryan spoke again, which stopped me.

“I saw him earlier. With a woman.”

I could hear my heart beating in my chest at what I heard. I felt my entire body turning cold as I heard Ryan’s next words.

“I know it’s him. It’s Jack… I saw Jack enter the hotel earlier before I arrived here… He entered with his ex-wife, Crista.”