Episode Eighty-Five
I thought I could handle the party without any problems, but a few minutes in the door and I was already panicking.
Running into Rainer on the front steps had felt like the keys turning in the ignition of a car I wasn’t driving.
My heart raced along, my eyes sweeping the crowd to see him, and I couldn’t believe I was so quickly out of control.
It wasn’t as if I hadn’t seen Rainer in the last few weeks. He seemed to pop up everywhere, and I had gotten used to the sudden moments we shared.
Once I caught sight of his fancy sports car at the little hotel in my hometown.
I could have passed without seeing him, but I peeked in the windows and saw him sitting alone at a table.
He claimed his work friend had just left. Two days later, he happened to be grabbing lunch at the same restaurant as me.
When my lunch meeting fell through, we had a long meal together. I hadn’t gone more than four days without seeing him, so I couldn’t understand why tonight felt so different.
I tried to tell myself it was because we were all dressed up. Rainer looked like a heartthrob straight off the movie screen in his black tuxedo.
His hair was mussed, but all it did was give him a human appeal. It made me want to tangle my hands in it as we kissed. . .
I jolted myself out of the daydream and tried to concentrate on what Berger was saying. It didn’t seem to matter if I was listening as Berger was talking at high speed.
His oddly excited behavior made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. What was I missing? I couldn’t help but think this was some sort of hazing opportunity.
I was completely exposed on the back portico. The luxurious green lawn swept up and away from the portico like a wide amphitheater, and I felt like I was in view.
As Berger continued to chatter, I got the idea he was going to prank me. It would be just like Stan to have to pull one more thing over on his protege before he retired for good.
“Berger, I’m sorry, but I’m going to head back inside and make sure Stan doesn’t need my help,” I said.
He tried to block my way, but the look I gave him made him stand down.
I almost made it through the French doors before Stan himself caught me and steered me back outside.
“Isn’t it a beautiful night?” Stan asked.
“Are you drunk?” Stan chuckled and threw an arm around my shoulders.
“Not yet, my dear, but it feels like a good night to celebrate, doesn’t it?” I tried to shrug his arm off.
“Why are you so cheerful? Shouldn’t you be complaining about the buzzards circling the dead body of your career?”
“No, I’m glad to be giving it up. It’s all a game for the young, you allospecific. Now that your career is on a high trajectory, I can sit back and enjoy the simple things,” Stan said.
I gestured to the lavish silk banners and delicate crystal lanterns that decorated the immense facade of his mansion.
“The simple things? Like what?”
“How about young love?” Stan asked. I stopped short and rooted my high heels to the ground.
“Now I know something is wrong, Stan. Tell me what’s going on. Are you dying?” Stan hooted with laughter.
“No! I might be old, but at least I’m young at heart. You, on the other hand, need to let a little more love in your life.”
“Oh, God, not more dating advice. Please, Stan, can we just enjoy your retirement party?” I shivered, still convinced my colleagues were about to haze me.
Then I saw Rainer, and it was the rest of the party that turned hazy.
It wasn’t the elegant and sexy cut of his tuxedo or the way his dark hair shone under the lanterns.
It was his electric blue eyes as they locked onto me. In that one glance, I saw worry, hope, and something that lit a fire deep in my belly.
Or at least I thought I did. It had been weeks since Rainer even mentioned our private interlude on Berger’s yacht.
I wondered if his passion for me had finally waned, and I couldn’t blame him.
I had done everything I could to bury it, hide it away, and now I was afraid it would light me up like a bonfire. I wanted Rainer.
More than that, the few weeks of seeing him here and there had cemented in my mind how much I loved having him around.
I loved him, and I couldn’t imagine he would return my feelings.
I wondered only briefly how Rainer had gotten to the back portico from the front steps without me seeing him pass by.
Then I saw Otto gently shooing party-goers off the portico and onto the lawn.
The crowd thinned between Rainer and me. Finally, Stan squeezed me and then stepped back.
“Is this a prank?” I asked Rainer. He blew out a tense breath and tried to smile.
“No,” he said.
“This is a proposal.” Rainer dropped to one knee, and with the whole lavish party, full of our friends and colleagues, as a backdrop, he asked me to marry him.
“And all I ask is that you come home to me,” Rainer said.
“After you work, after you accomplish everything you want, I’ll be there for you, if you let me.”
Epilogue
Tasha’s [POV]
Sometimes in the middle of work, the entire scene washed over me. Like a tsunami, it knocked everything else out of the way.
The wide window of my downtown Oakland office disappeared and I found myself standing on Stan’s portico again.
Rainer was on one knee, his words so soft and stressed that I had to lean forward and down to hear him.
Then I reeled back, not believing I had heard him right. Rainer had to shuffle forward across the bricks to catch my hand and try to convince me he was serious.
What caught me was his sincere offer to always be there when I came home.
No other expectations, no other old-fashioned notions of marriage, just me pursuing my career and coming home each night to find him there for me.
After I said yes, Rainer launched from the bricks and caught me up in his arms.
Instead of the molten kiss I expected, he lifted me high in the air and spun me around until the twinkling lanterns and lights of Stan’s mansion flowed into bright circles.
And then we kissed. I leaned back in my office chair, ready to draw the warmth of that memory around me like a blanket.
“Ms. Nichols?” Topher stood in the doorway, and when I spotted him, I jumped out of my chair.
“What? I mean, I’m here. What do you need?” My assistant gave me a funny little smile.
“I tried buzzing twice, but you didn’t answer, so I knocked.” I smoothed down my suit.
“I was just deep in thought. Business, of course.”
“Of course,” Topher said.
“Though it would be very helpful if you set aside some time to think about a wedding date.”
“Yes, yes, of course.” I shuffled papers needlessly on my desk.
“Rainer and I have been meaning to discuss it. We just keep getting, ah, distracted.” Topher held up his hand.
“No need to explain. I have a few suggestions if it would be helpful.”
“Helpful for you?” I asked my eager assistant. He nodded emphatically.
“How am I supposed to plan the perfect wedding if I don’t even know what season it will be?”
“Fine, yes. As soon as these projects are a little further along, I will sit down with Rainer and we will choose a wedding date,” I said.
“It’s just a little bit more complicated than I expected.”
“How so?” Topher asked. He pursed his lips, unable to hide the irritation he felt at not being able to plan.
I couldn’t very well tell my assistant that every time Rainer and I sat down to talk about our wedding we ended up in a passionate tangle.
It was hard to think about giving that up in exchange for a mound of details such as what kind of fish we should serve at some overblown reception.
“Well, you of all people should know that I can’t compromise work at this point in my career. Things are still just getting off the ground here, and I can’t lose focus.”
I sat down again, faced my computer, and couldn’t remember what I had been working on before falling into a daydream.
“I can put in the extra hours, Tasha. Or you can hire a wedding planner. It doesn’t have to be a bother,” Topher reminded me.