Diary of Fragile Heart (Spin of Loving You Too Long)

Gladwin retorted harshly, causing his mother to widen her eyes. “Sorry, Mama. For me, my wife is only one, and that’s Flavia. The only woman I love and want to touch is Flavia, not her,” he said, nodding his head towards Phoebe. “I wouldn’t even be tempted even if Phoebe were naked and spread in front of me,” he said insultingly. Phoebe, Julie, and Abigail’s parents were shocked by Gladwin’s harsh words.

“Gladwin!” Abigail’s father reprimanded.

Gladwin turned his head to look at his eldest brother. He knew his words were impolite, but he acted indifferent because Gladwin was tired of all this drama.

“What’s up, Brother? Just say what you want to say. Since I’m already here, why don’t we contact Harry and ask him too?”

“Why involve Harry?” His mother asked confusedly.

“So you can ask him how he would feel if you offered the same choice you gave me to him when his wife didn’t get pregnant within a year!”

“Ask Harry if he’s willing to leave his beloved wife and marry another woman that you choose for him! Ask Harry’s wife if she’s okay with letting her husband have another wife without divorcing her! Why are you only doing this wicked deed to me?!” Gladwin’s voice rose with anger. “Why didn’t you do the same thing to Harry? Why didn’t you give me and Flavia the same chance during the time you gave to Harry and his wife? You let them stay together even though it took five years for them to have a child. But why can’t you do that for me and Flavia?! Don’t ever ask me to touch her. Just seeing her makes me feel like a defective man!” He hissed.

“Gladwin!” His mother exclaimed again, her voice filled with pain.

“Why? Do you want to keep forcing me? Why don’t you just lock me up with her in a room and install CCTV inside. You’ll see what happens between us. No matter how hard she tries to seduce me, I’ll remain impotent towards her. It’s different when I’m with Flavia. Just seeing her smile is enough to arouse me.” Gladwin’s vulgar words made everyone feel embarrassed. Especially Phoebe, she felt truly humiliated by all of Gladwin’s words, but Gladwin didn’t care.

“Gladwin!” Abigail’s father reprimanded.

“What else, Brother? What I’m saying is the truth. Aren’t you like that too?” Gladwin’s sudden question made Abigail’s father blush. “Just imagining Flavia’s smile is enough to make me instantly aroused. While seeing her,” Gladwin glanced briefly at Phoebe before turning his attention back to his brother and shaking his head, “I feel nothing.”

“Lies! You say that because you’ve never tried it,” Phoebe’s voice was now heard. Her tears seemed to have dried up.

Gladwin snorted. “I wouldn’t even want to try it,” he replied disgustedly.

“Gladwin?!” Julie exclaimed, exasperated.

“What else, Mama! Do I need to consume Viagra to prove it?” He challenged. “Even with high doses, Gladwin would rather endure the pain of suppressing his desire and soak in an ice bath than have sex with her,” he continued.

Julie Hampton bowed her head in despair. Tears fell on her aging face, but traces of her beauty still lingered. “Why, Gladwin? Why are you like this?”

“Why what?” Gladwin retorted. “Mama, you’re asking the wrong question. The question you should be asking is ‘Because of Whom’. Because of whom I’ve become like this,” he said flatly, making Mrs. Julie tense.

“Gladwin…” Julie whispered softly.

“What else do you want me to do now, Ma? Do you want me to lick her feet? Fine, I’ll do it.” Gladwin rose from his seat, crossed the table, and approached where his mother and Phoebe were sitting. He kneeled in front of Phoebe and reached for her foot, but his mother pushed his shoulder. “What else?!” Gladwin snapped angrily. The rush of emotions in his heart felt excruciating. His breaths became short.

“I don’t want you to do that!”

“Then what?” Gladwin looked at his mother frustratedly. “You want Gladwin to be nice to her? Sorry, I can’t,” he replied with a shake of his head.

“Why won’t you give me a chance?” Phoebe screamed. Gladwin, who was now standing, looked in her direction. “What am I lacking compared to Flavia? I love you too,” she shouted.

“You’re asking me?” He asked sarcastically, pointing to his chest. “Me?” He repeated, and Phoebe nodded. “Do you want me to answer that honestly?” Gladwin asked sharply. Phoebe looked up, giving her full attention to Gladwin. Gladwin smirked sardonically, his gaze piercing sharply at Phoebe. “There’s only one sentence I can say about Flavia. She is far superior to you in every way. And there are too many paragraphs that could explain that sentence,” he snorted.

“And what about you? Love? What kind of love do you have for me? It’s not love. Nor obsession. But greed. You can look up the meaning of greed in the dictionary yourself.”

“Real love doesn’t hurt the one you love. Real love is letting the one you love be happy. But you? You only bring suffering. You made me lose the one I love, you made me lose half of my life. You call that love? You’re even slowly killing me. Here.” Gladwin pointed to his chest.

“Gladwin…” his mother uttered softly.

“Yes, Mama? What else? Still not satisfied with slowly killing me?” Gladwin retorted. “Do I need to commit suicide in front of you to make you satisfied?” The question was met with a slap. A sensation of heat spread, leaving a reddish mark on Gladwin’s face.

“Watch your words! I never taught you to be like this.”

Gladwin laughed. Not a joyful laugh, but a forced one that sounded painful to the ears. “Be like what? Be petty?” Gladwin taunted again. “I actually learned all of this from you,” he accused. “Didn’t you ever teach us to repay kindness with kindness? And I’m doing just that. Marrying Phoebe is something you consider good. And not touching Phoebe is the kindness I can give to you.”

“Gladwin…”

“Mama, deep down in your small heart, you know what and who I need. But you choose to turn a blind eye because of your narrow-mindedness. You act selfishly and choose to ignore my feelings and Flavia’s as well. So I choose to be selfish too and choose to ignore your feelings. Fair, isn’t it?”

Julie Hampton slumped, drowned in her tears. But Gladwin paid no attention to her.

“Stop calling me here if you only want to discuss my issues and Phoebe’s. Because no matter how long, I will never grant your dreams.” Gladwin then left the family room and chose to leave even before dinner started.

Abigail remained silent, frozen in her place. She turned off the screen that had been on since earlier. She felt sorry for her grandmother, but she couldn’t fully blame Gladwin. Gladwin and Flavia deserved to be happy in their own way. Especially since they had never hurt anyone, so why should they be hurt now.

Abigail left the house quietly. She felt uncomfortable staying there any longer. Finally, she chose to walk, heading towards another residence that felt like a second home to her.

Claire welcomed her as usual. The cloudiness Abigail brought with her seemed to diminish at least a little. “What’s happened to you?” Claire asked as Abigail sat on the sofa with a downcast face. Antony came in with Francisca in his arms. The little girl was whimpering because she didn’t feel well.

Without much talk, Abigail handed her phone over after opening the video she had recorded earlier. Antony stood behind his wife and watched. Anger surged within Antony suddenly; his hand even clenched tightly, the veins in his jaw bulging. But not long after, he felt his heart calm down.

He didn’t regret accepting Gladwin’s proposal because it turned out that the man’s love for his daughter remained unwavering. Antony was confident that Gladwin and Flavia’s marriage would endure even though Flavia was currently missing.

Missing according to those who wished her departure. And also missing in Gladwin’s eyes because his daughter wanted her to be. But for their family, Flavia was simply ‘away.’ And that meant she would come back.