THIRTY-THREE
“Argh” I held my head that still throbbing from the pain. I also looked at what I was wearing because it had changed. For sure, Lauren dressed me. Because I don’t remember what happened last night. I passed out after what happened to us.
The door opened and I assumed that it was her.
“Wife,” I called but to my surprise, she ignored me and immediately left.
I held my head again. I feel like it’s going to burst with so much pain. I didn’t drink that much but why did it hurt so much? Or maybe I just didn’t realize that I just kept drinking.
The door opened again and Lauren came in. She had a tray with only food. A bowl is still steaming. She came to me and stood in front of me.
“Oh, take a sip of soup.” She placed the tray in front of me and then turned around but I immediately grabbed her.
“Wife, what’s wrong?”
“Go ahead, eat.”
“Are you mad at me?” Then I remembered what I did last night. Maybe, she is angry because I forced her to have sex with me. “Is it because of what I did to you last night? I am sorry, I couldn’t control myself when I saw you.”
“It is because of what you did to yourself,” she said annoyed.
“Huh?” She faced me with a frown.
“What huh? My God, hubby. You drove home while you were drunk? What if you get dizzy on the way? What if you have an accident? Oh my God, you’re not thinking anymore?” I was shocked. I thought she was mad at me because of what I did to her. I feel like a child being scolded by my mother because of the way she looks.
“You’re so inconsiderate, hubby. You are not thinking.”
“Wife.” I held her hand. I don’t know whether to laugh or feel sad because she’s angry. “Sorry.”
“Then you’ll do it again?” I shook my head while pouting. “Are you sure?” I nodded.
“Promised, wife. I won’t do it again.”
“I won’t do it.” She mimicked me. “Go ahead. Eat to warm your stomach. I’m just going to fix something outside,” she said calmly.
“You’re not mad?”
“No.”
“You’re still angry,” I said tenderly.
“Not anymore.”
“Kiss me if you don’t.” She rolls her eyes and then kisses me on the lips. But I pulled her and hugged her.
“Hubby!”
“You are a good kisser. And you’re cute when you get angry.”
“Really?”
“Yes.”
“It’s good that you complimented my lips.”
“Hendrick’s lucky if you can stay with him, he’s unlucky if he lets you go.”
“Really, you’re a good kisser, too, hubby, but you’re better in bed. Hehehe, your future wife is lucky because you are good at grinding.”
“Really?”
“Yup. Lucky to be our partner, hubby. But while they are not in our lives, let’s enjoy it first.” And she kissed me.
We kiss passionately while closing our eyes. Lauren’s every kiss was dizzying. Especially when her tongue hits my lips. Her lips are soft and I have to admit that I lose my mind when I kiss her.
Her smells soothe my nose. The softness of her body makes my stomach tickle. Her sweet lips and sweet juice craves me always.
“Hubby, eat now.”
“It’s like I want to eat you more.”
“Hubby.”
“I’d rather annoy you, wife.”
“Alright, I want to.” She laughs. And she didn’t do anything when I laid her down to claim her. Damn, why can’t I resist her?
I AM EXCITING to GO home. Every now and then, I want to go home. I don’t know what happens to me that even in a meeting my mind is at home. After a while, I looked at the clock to check the time to go home.
It’s 4:50 pm. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with going home ten minutes early. I didn’t do it always so I think there’s nothing wrong. I arrange my things when the door opens. To my surprise, I saw Dylan.
“Oh, where are you going?” he asked.
“Home.”
“There are still ten minutes,” he said with a smile.
“I don’t do anything.”
“I have something else for you to review, have you reviewed it yet?” I stop when I remember. I didn’t review it because I spent the whole day thinking about home. “No?” he asked.
“I’m busy, I’ll bring it home.”
“You did nothing the whole day, how come you’re busy?” I couldn’t answer his question. “Or maybe you’re thinking about Lauren.”
“And why was Lauren included in our conversation?”
“You know what Dale, your lips can lie but your actions can’t. It is too obvious that you have already fallen in love with her.”
“I am not, how many times do I have to tell you?”
“Why wouldn’t you admit it, Dale? It’s too obvious. Don’t tell me you don’t feel it. Or let’s say you’re still in denial.”
“Because it’s not really. You’re pushing and pushing, I’m not in love with her.”
“Oh, come on, Dale. It’s easy to say by word of mouth. But go ahead, believe your own lies. Pretend you’re not excited to see her, pretend you’re not looking for her scent. Pretend, you are not happy in her presence and pretend you are not looking for her hug.” Then he turned back but immediately faced. “Oh, and also pretend that your body is not looking for her body. Bye, brother.”
When Dylan left I went back to sitting. I thought about everything he said because everything he said was true. But is it enough reason that I can say I love her? Maybe that’s normal because we spend a lot of time together. But love——-I can’t say I love her.
I just shook my head. The earlier excitement I felt to go home immediately disappeared. It’s already past 5 pm but I don’t feel like going home. Because I suddenly doubted myself.
My phone beeped and I saw Lauren’s message if I am on my way. I immediately felt excitement and joy. I feel butterflies fly inside. When I realized this isn’t normal, my smile immediately disappeared. I put the cell phone back in my pocket and didn’t answer.
I shouldn’t feel like this. But maybe that’s normal for friends. I think. But why did I feel it now? Oh fuck, probably because our friendship just deepened.
I don’t want to go home but I have no choice but to go home. I just put Dylan’s words out of my mind as well as my feelings.
When I reached home I heard a noise from the kitchen. I will assume it’s Lauren. Even if I don’t want to admit it to myself, I can’t deny that I want to go there to hug her, to kiss her.
I hesitated. My left and right brain are fighting. I want her, I want to kiss her. But what if I get used to it? Or should I say, I’m used to it? But in the end, I listened more to what I wanted to do. I went to the kitchen and saw someone wearing a maid’s uniform.
“Lauren?”
“Hello, sir.”
“What the hell are you wearing, Lauren?” I have an annoying question. It seems like roleplaying that she likes is what I don’t like. And I don’t seem happy to see her now.
“This, sir?”
“Stop calling me sir, Lauren.” But instead of following me, she came closer to me.
“Why, sir?”
“I said stop calling me, sir.” I held her hand tightly. “Stop this fucking roleplaying of yours.” Then I let go of her hand.
“Hubby!” I ignored him and continued to enter the room. Fuck! She triggers me. “Hubby!” She followed me but I was still disgusted to see her face.
“Hubby.”
“Don’t come near me!”
“H-Hubby.”
“Fix yourself. I hate to see you wearing that kind of shit.” I got dressed without looking at her. I immediately lay down and covered myself. “I don’t want to eat and don’t wake me up.”
Fuck, I don’t feel right anymore. And what we are doing is not right. I think this nonsense needs to stop.