Sibling Conversation Part Two
Arletta Jessica McDowell POV
"Have you and Sammy doing something crossed the line like had sex?"
I glared when I heard Ben's question. "What? Are you out of your mind?"
"Yes, it could be that you are doing so and are afraid of being found out by Mom, which makes your attitude strange."
Yeah, my guess was proven. Ben had deliberately asked that question because he saw the change in my behaviour yesterday. I was a little relieved that he did not mention my two phobias.
"I am a virgin until now. Did you think Sammy and I had that such audacity?"
Ben's spontaneous questions were sometimes beyond logic because Sammy and I did not go as far as my brother alleged. We like to hold hands, hug each other, or kiss and nothing more than that.
"Who knew you were forced by Sammy? If it was true, tell me. I will kill him."
Oh, well. I did not blame Ben, but Sammy's not that low. He never forced me to have sex.
"No, he never asked me like that. Sammy does have a lot of annoying sides, but he's not a player, let alone a sex criminal."
I was not defending Sammy, but he was not what Ben thought he was. My boyfriend never asked for sex, especially since he knew that it was strictly forbidden by Mom. I still remember when I brought him home, Mom had laid out all the family rules, including that we had to remain virgins and that we could only have sex when we were married.
"Are you sure?" Ben asked, but his gaze still showed no trust in me.
I quickly shook my head. If Ben still thought so, then it could be bad. My silly brother could report this crazy conversation to Mom. I knew him so well.
I was lucky because Mom was not the type of person who trusted anyone easily. Before deciding anything, Mom always investigated what happened to her subordinates.
"Yes, I am. Why would I lie? You think Mom does not know what we are doing in or out of this house?" I answered with confidence.
"I hope you are telling the truth, Sissy. Do not let me see you crying and you admit you're pregnant with Sammy's child."
I threw the pillow on the side of the sofa at Ben. It hit my brother in the face. "Are you crazy? I can't possibly lose my virginity that easily!"
Damn it! Were there so many girls pregnant outside of marriage at Ben's school that he could say that? I knew that having sex with your boyfriend or fiancé was a common thing in Dumorz, but that did not mean that everyone behaved the same way. Our family was one of them.
Ben did not throw the void back but instead put the object on his lap. His flat face seemed to indicate that everything was fine. "I am not crazy, Sissy. I have often heard girls' stories about how they got pregnant, then their boyfriends did not want to take responsibility, so they had to abort the fetus in the womb. I do not want that to happen to you."
"How can you listen to the girl's stories when you are so cold to them?"
This time, I was suspicious of Ben's explanation. He was known as one of those young men who was not easily approached by any girl.
My brother shrugged both shoulders. "How could I not hear that, they are always looking for a quiet place, and I was there."
I tried to digest everything Ben said. He seemed serious, and I was aware of my brother's attitude. "So, did you think that I did the same as them? How long have you known me? We have been siblings since you were born."
I did not blame Ben, but the crazy topic of pregnancy had to be stopped as soon as possible before the chaotic assumptions got any wilder. Ben was just making sure that I, his sister, was okay, although his method was very strange, even beyond my imagination.
"It is precisely because I have known you since birth that I am asking honestly." Ben said earnestly.
There were times when everything was fun, especially when you had an attentive little brother, even though he was quiet. It was just that Ben's ways were magical. Not everyone could understand his different way of thinking. I hoped that whoever became my brother's girlfriend would be ready with all of Ben's sometimes antique, critical, and strange behaviour.
"I do not want to be naked in front of my boyfriend, Ben. That is my life principle."
I was not a hypocrite; the temptation to do more than kiss Sammy existed. However, when good family rules had become part of my life's guidelines, they would control me, and I was happy to live by them.
Ben kept quiet, while still watching me. Was this a good sign or the opposite? Hopefully, my brother would not ask the same question, or he would find an unexpected source of new questions. Ben's attitude was really suspicious! "In that case, why were you acting strange yesterday when you came home from Dad's office? If I am not mistaken, you were driven home by Sammy, right?" Ben asked many questions, and I was not surprised.
"I was fed up with Dad's attitude, plus Sammy and I fought all the way home. It put me in a bad mood and I just wanted to be angry. I had to see a psychiatrist, because I could not take all the stress." I answered calmly, not wanting to mention the core problem that caused the real reason.
Yeah, they did not need to know about the damn incident in the elevator. I wish that part were gone forever from my mind, but was that possible? I wish I could turn back the time. I would not come to my dad's office, or at least, I could come at a different time.
Ben frowned. "Why do you need therapy? You are perfectly healthy!"
I grinned, but only briefly. "Therapy is important, Ben. If we are under so much pressure that we can't think or there are other reasons, it is better to go to an expert. Do not take your mental health lightly."
I disagree with my brother's assumption. Everyone needed therapy, including Ben and me. Since our childhood, we have been under pressure from Dad, so all the hurt, trauma, stress, and anxiety that had long settled in the soul must be healed immediately by someone who was competent in their field.
"Then have you found a psychologist or psychiatrist in Dumorz?"
That was a good question. I myself had not found that person at all, not knowing where to look. "I have not found one yet. Do you have any recommendations or perhaps have heard your friends talk about a good psychiatrist?"
Ben shook his head, so my hopes of going to a psychiatrist were dashed.
"Sissy, why do you not ask Mom?"
I shook my head, as the idea was not a good one. "No. I do not want to trouble her."
"In that case, how can you-"
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